When I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship. The
average cost for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on reservations
at Princess and I can get a long term discount and senior discount price of $135
per day. That leaves $65 a day for:
1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day;
2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle to the restaurant, or I
can have room service (which means I can have breakfast in bed every day of the
week);
3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free washers
and dryers, and shows every night;
4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free soap and shampoo;
5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5 worth of
tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you;
6. I will get to meet new people every 7 or 14 days;
7. T.V. broken? Light bulb need hanging? Need to have the mattress replaced? No
Problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your inconvenience;
8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don’t even have to ask for them;
9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip, you’re on Medicare. If you
fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade you to a suite for
the rest of your life;
Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the Panama Canal,
Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or name where you want to go? Princess
will have a ship ready to go. So don’t look for me in a nursing home, just call
shore to ship.
P.S. And don’t forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at no
charge!
see also
Aging & Travel Sections
A. A. A. D. D.
Be Careful Pulling Out
Cell Phone For Seniors
Daily Exercise for Seniors
Driving Tip For The Elderly
False Teeth
Justice For All
Neck Exercises to do at the Computer
New Wine For Seniors - Anti-Diuretic Hybrid Grape
Ritz Nursing Home
Senile Agitation
Senior Health Care Solution
Snowplow For Seniors
Winter Laundry
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