U.S. Navy Ships

“I saw these ships come sailing in...”

Ships in U.S. naval history



USS Ronald Reagan
Seeing it next to the Arizona Memorial really puts its size into perspective
USS Reagan

When the Bridge pipes “Man the Rail”, there’s a lot of rail to man on this monster:
shoulder to shoulder, around 4.5 acres. Her displacement is 100,000 tons
with full complement.

Capability
Top speed exceeds 30 knots, powered by two nuclear reactors that can operate for
more than 20 years without refueling.
1. Expected to operate in the fleet for about 50 years
2. Carries over 80 combat aircraft
3. Three arresting cables can stop a 28-ton aircraft going 150 miles per hour
in less than 400 feet

Size
1. Towers 20 stories above the waterline
2. 1092 feet long - nearly as long as the Empire State Building is tall
3. Flight deck covers 4.5 acres
4. 4 bronze propellers, each 21 feet across, weighing 66,200 pounds
5. 2 rudders, each 29 by 22 feet, weighing 50 tons
6. 4 high speed aircraft elevators, each over 4,000 square feet

Capacity
1. Home to 6,000 Navy personnel
2. Carries enough food and supplies to operate for 90 days
3. 18,150 meals served daily
4. Distillation plants provide 400,000 gallons of fresh water from
sea water daily, enough for 2,000 homes
5. Nearly 30,000 light fixtures, 1,325 miles of cable, and 1,400 telephones
6. 14,000 pillowcases and 28,000 sheets


USS Jimmy Carter
USS Jimmy Carter

The USS Jimmy Carter is a secret aircraft carrier, based on
Canada’s STOL (Short Takeoff and Landing) technology.
It’s so secret that noone knows whether it did “takeoff.”

USS William Jefferson Clinton
USS Clinton

The USS William Jefferson Clinton set sail today from its home port of Vancouver, B.C.

The ship is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a standing legacy to President Bill Clinton
“for his foresight in military budget cuts” and his conduct while formerly holding
the office of President.

The ship is constructed nearly entirely from recycled aluminum and is completely solar
powered with a top speed of 5 knots. It boasts an arsenal comprised of one unarmed
F14 Tomcat or one unarmed F18 Hornet aircraft which, although they cannot be
launched from the 100 foot flight deck, form a very menacing presence.

As a standing order, there are no firearms allowed on board.
This crew, like the crew aboard the USS Jimmy Carter, is specially trained to avoid
conflicts and appease any and all enemies of the United States at all costs.

An onboard Type One DNC Universal Translator can send out messages of apology in
any language to anyone who may find America offensive. The number of apologies are
limitless and though some may seem hollow and disingenuous, the Navy advises
all apologies will sound very sincere.

In times of conflict, the USS Clinton has orders to seek refuge in Canada.


USS Barack Hussein Obama
USS Barack Hussein Obama

Details are vague. But don’t worry - he has a plan.



QuotaBills
Good government is good politics. - Richard J. Daley

There is no gambling like politics. - Benjamin Disraeli

In politics nothing is contemptible. - Benjamin Disraeli

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

Everybody knows politics is a contact sport. - Barrack Obama

Intelligence has nothing to do with politics. - Londo Molari

Politics is just show business for ugly people. - Jay Leno

Tell the men to fire faster and not give up the ship. - Captain James Lawrence

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

We have the best government in the world... that money can buy. - Mark Twain

War has rules, mud wrestling has rules - politics has no rules. - Ross Perot

For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program. - Bob Wells

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell

Politics is war without bloodshed while war is politics with bloodshed. - Mao Zedong

Politics is the chloroform of the Irish people, or, rather the hashish. - Oliver St. John Gogarty

Freedom of opinion can only exist when the government thinks itself secure. - Bertrand Russell

To lodge all power in one party and keep it there is to insure bad government. - Mark Twain

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated. - Will Rogers

Everyone wants to eat at the government's table, but nobody wants to do the dishes. - Werner Finck

Of all the tasks of government, the most basic is to protect its citizens from violence. - John Foster Dulles

My brother Bob doesn't want to be in government - he promised Dad he'd go straight. - John F Kennedy

When I was a child, I wanted to raise horses in Wyoming or be a cabin boy on a pirate ship. - Sadie Jones

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. - Will Rogers

I think it's an absolute disaster that Australia, the government, allowed kangaroo culling. - Steve Irwin

What is the first part of politics? Education. The second? Education. And the third? Education. - Jules Michelet

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

One of the key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace, good people don't go into government. - Donald Trump

Politics: Poli, a Latin word meaning "many"; and tics, meaning "bloodsucking creatures." - Robin Williams

Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless. - Milton Friedman

Oh my. Space travel sounds rather perilous. I can assure you they will never get me on one of those dreadful Star Ships. - C-3PO

It's especially hard if the government is not providing services, or is even conducting ethnic cleansing against you. - Paul Harvey

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy. - Groucho Marx

When it comes to politics, I sit down on a sofa and grab some popcorn - or sometimes I crouch down in order not to get shot. - Sergey Galitsky

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers

Ever occur to you why some of us can be this much concerned with animals suffering? Because government is not. Why not? Animals don't vote. - Paul Harvey


see also   History,  Military  &  Ship  Sections
Canada’s Secret Aircraft Carrier
Defence Budget Cuts

 

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20-Apr-2019