I just wanted to let you know that I have recently been diagnosed with AAADD - Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder...
I decide to do the laundry, start down the hall and notice the newspaper on the table. OK,
I’m going to do the laundry... BUT FIRST I’m going to read the newspaper. After that, I
notice the mail on the table. OK, I’ll just put the newspaper in the recycle stack....
BUT FIRST.... I’ll look through the pile of mail and see if there are any bills to be
paid. Yes. Now where is the checkbook?
Oops! there’s the empty glass from yesterday on the coffee table. I’m going to look for
BUT FIRST I need to put the glass in the sink. I head for the kitchen, look out the
window, notice my poor flowers need a drink of water, I put the glass in the sink and
there’s the remote for the TV on the kitchen counter. What’s it doing here? I’ll just put
BUT FIRST need to water those plants. I head for the door and... Aaaagh! stepped on the
cat. Cat needs to be fed. Okay, I’ll put the remote away and water the plants...
BUT FIRST I need to feed the cat.
END OF DAY: Laundry is not done, newspapers are still on the floor, glass is still in the
sink, bills are not paid, checkbook is still lost, and the cat ate the remote control...
And, when I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I’m baffled because...I
KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY!
I realize this condition is serious... I’d get help...
BUT FIRST... I think I’ll check my e-mail.
No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb
One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin
Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy. - Groucho Marx
After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields
Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes
A nurse will always give us hope,
an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets
I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett
The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb
The key to successful aging is to pay as little attention to it as possible. - Judith Regan
To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
This is a sharp medicine, but it is a physician for all diseases and miseries. - Sir Walter Raleigh
If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb
Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield
The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift
The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca
The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer
A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright
The yoga mat is a good place to turn when talk therapy and antidepressants aren't enough. - Amy Weintraub
Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold
The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson
In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer
The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer
I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield
One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler
Aging & Medical Sections
A. A. A. D. D.
Alzheimer’s or Parkinson’s?
Dreams Come True
Europe Road Trip
Beach Sign Training
That Won't Wash
Mega Samurai Puzzles B
Hold On Tight
New Driver Training
Bronx School Bus
Lead Sled Dog