Careful Dentist

How to get the best care for your teeth


A woman goes to the dentist to fix an annoying tooth ache.

As the dentist leans over to begin working on her, she grabs his crotch.

The dentist says, “Madam, I believe you’ve got a hold of my privates.”

The woman replies, “Yes. Now, we’re going to be careful not to hurt each other, aren’t we?”


QuotaBills
Floss like a boss! - Unknown

Keep calm and floss on. - Unknown

Teeth are always in style. - Unknown

Be careful calling attraction to themselves. - Archie Bunker

We break bones and we lose teeth. We play rugby. - Martin Johnson

Too much freedom can lead to the soul's decay. - Prince

Most every dental school has discount dental services. - Matthew Lesko

A man can't be to careful in his choice of enemies. - Oscar Wilde

Love conquers all things - except poverty and toothache. - Mae West

Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing. - Johnny Depp

Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. - Miguel de Cervantes

Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown

The man with a toothache thinks everyone happy whose teeth are sound. - George Bernard Shaw

It is after you have lost your teeth that you can afford to buy steaks. - Pierre Renoir

If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him. - Martin H. Fischer

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Too many of today's children have straight teeth and crooked morals. - Unknown

A man loses his illusions first, his teeth second, and his follies last. - Helen Rowland

We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be. - Kurt Vonnegut

I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield

I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence

I still have my teeth. I don't want to lose them at age 61 in some hockey game. - Jim Flaherty

Drill for oil? You mean drill into the ground to try and find oil? You're crazy. - Unknown

The grinding of the intellect is for most people as painful as a dentist's drill. - Leonard Woolf

For there was never yet a philosopher
That could endure the toothache patiently. - William Shakespeare

Logic is the hygiene the mathematician practices to keep his ideas healthy and strong. - Hermann Weyl

Adam and Eve had many advantages but the principal one was that they escaped teething. - Mark Twain

If suffering brought wisdom, the dentist's office would be full of luminous ideas. - Mason Cooley

A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew. - Herb Caen

I have a constant sweet tooth, so I like anything from the bakery, like cupcakes, cookies. - Carmen Electra

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket. - Ambrose Bierce

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves. - Rodney Dangerfield

Talent is God-given. Be humble. Fame is man-given. Be thankful. Conceit is self-given. Be careful. - Harvey Mackay

Some tortures are physical
And some are mental,
But the one that is both
is dental. - Ogden Nash

Some old women and men grow bitter with age. The more their teeth drop out, the more biting they get. - George D. Prentice

It is guaranteed to put all teeth on edge, including George Washington's, wherever they might be. - Vincent Canby

I live at the dentist's. I'm on my third set of teeth that they put in with nails and screws. - Charles N. Reilly

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. - Johnny Carson

You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you. - Walt Disney

Most men would rather have their bellies opened for five hundred dollars than have a tooth pulled for five. - Martin H. Fischer

The best and cheapest dentistry is when the right thing is done extremely well the first time and it lasts. - Unknown

Sometimes a man just can't satisfy all of a woman's desires. Which is why God invented dental floss. - Unknown

All satire is blind to the forces liberated by decay. Which is why total decay has absorbed the forces of satire. - Theodor Adorno

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of them will own up to a lack of humor? - Frank Colby

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

In California virtually everyone has had their teeth whitened. If they all smiled at once, they would give us a headache. - Garrison Keillor

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. - Graham Greene

I am keeping with tradition today. After I learned of my Golden Globe nomination, I went to the dentist, so today, let's make it the orthodontist. - Frankie Muniz


see also   Dentist   Section
Dentist Bowling
Dentist Talk
“No Time For Anesthetic” Golfer
Pet Dentist
Staff Teeth

 

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19-Aug-2019