Ukrainian Perogies

When you can hardly wait for your next plate of perogies


An elderly Ukrainian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite Ukrainian perogies with fried onions wafting up the stairs.

He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs.

With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen. If not for death’s agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table was literally hundreds of his favourite perogies.

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his Ukrainian wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the perogies was already in his mouth, seemingly bringing him back to life. The aged and withered man trembled on his way to the perogies at the edge of the table, when he was suddenly smacked with a wooden spoon by his wife.

“Back off!” she said. “They’re for the funeral.”


QuotaBills
Tacos are the food of genius. - Heather Brewer

Fine words do not produce food. - Nigeria Proverb

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

Food tastes better when you wear it. - Erin Dealey

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American Saying

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

An Irish wedding is a tame thing to an Irish funeral. - Mary Deasy

Food tastes best when you eat it with your own spoon. - Denmark Proverb

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

Before eating, always take a little time to thank the food. - Arapaho Proverb

You are only master of food that you haven't yet eaten. - Tibet Proverb

Cooking certain dishes, like roast pork, reminds me of my mother. - Maya Angelou

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

Fang drops so much food on his ties we keep them in the refrigerator. - Phyllis Diller

If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James Beard

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. - Mark Twain

On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners. - George Mikes

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed. - A.J. Liebling

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

The automatic stabilizer is unemployment insurance, food stamps, additional coverage of Medicaid. - Franklin Raines

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches awaiting Easter. - Fran Lebowitz

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

Because of their cuisine, Germans don't consider farting rude. They'd certainly be out of luck if they did. - P.J. O'Rourke

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

No matter what the recipe, any baker can do wonders in the kitchen with some good ingredients and an upbeat attitude. - Buddy Valastro

The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill. - Bryan Miller

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen." - Unknown

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

There is one longing almost as deep and imperious as the desire for food and sleep. It is the desire to be great. It is the desire to be important. - Dale Carnegie

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock


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22-Jun-2017