Canadian Math

Disclaimer: hockey puck velocity may vary from rink to rink



Canadian Math Problem

In classical mechanics, linear momentum or translational momentum is the
product of the mass and velocity of an object.
In Canada, p=mv where p=puck, m=movement (as in towards an octopus), and v=velo city (in Newfoundland, eh)

QuotaBills
Hockey is a tough game. - Bobby Orr

Mathematics has beauties of its own. - J.W.A. Young

People on the streets are ready for hockey. - Eric Lindros

I am an expert in Higher Level Math: You + God = Enough - Zig Ziglar

Figure skaters have awful perceptions of hockey players. - Kristi Yamaguchi

Math is like love - a simple idea but it can get complicated. - R. Drabek

Canada has never been a melting pot; more like a tossed salad. - Arnold Edinborough

For me, baseball is more comparable to chess than it is to hockey. - Jeff Garlin

I love Canadians because I don't see very much racism in Canada. - Patti LaBelle

Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie

My wife likes the hockey smell because it's the smell of a warrior. - David Walton

In mathematics, you don't understand things. You just get used to them. - John von Neumann

I still have my teeth. I don't want to lose them at age 61 in some hockey game. - Jim Flaherty

When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award. - Jack Nicholson

Canada is a good country to be from. It has a gentler slower pace - it lends perspective. - Paul Anka

Canada is founded upon principles that recognize the supremacy of God and the rule of law. - Stockwell Day

If a young person has any idealism at all, it's strongest about the time he finishes college. - Sargent Shriver

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown

In Pierre Elliott Trudeau, Canada has at last produced a political leader worthy of assassination. - Irving Layton

If I feel unhappy, I do mathematics to become happy. If I am happy, I do mathematics to keep happy. - Alfred Renyi

Trudeau's contribution was not to build Canada but to destroy it, and I had to come in and save it. - Brian Mulroney

Mathematics is distinguished from all other sciences except only ethics, in standing in no need of ethics. - Charles Peirce

Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years. - George Burns

Make no mistake. Canada is not a bilingual country. In fact it is less bilingual today than it has ever been. - Stephen Harper

I love those hockey moms. You know what they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull is? Lipstick. - Sarah Palin

Canada has given us John Candy and Martin Short and Bill Shatner and Lord knows how many other wonderful performers. - Jamie Farr

Canada's political parties spend a few years in opposition and then govern as if it's permanent payback time. - Bob Rae

In my last year of school, I was voted Class Optimist and Class Pessimist. Looking back, I realize I was only half right. - Jack Nicholson

Mathematics is indeed dangerous in that it absorbs students to such a degree that it dulls their senses to everything else. - Prinz zu Hohlenlohe-Ingelfingen Kraft

The Arc de Triomphe, the Eiffel Tower. They're monumental. They're straight out of Page 52 in your school history book. - Billy Crystal

If you're skinny and you can't play hockey in Canada, you aren't left with a lot of options. I was left with running. - Malcolm Gladwell

Mathematics takes us into the region of absolute necessity, to which not only the actual word, but every possible word, must conform. - Bertrand Russell

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes. - Tommy Douglas

I tell them that if they will occupy themselves with the study of mathematics they will find it the best remedy against the lusts of the flesh. - Thomas Mann

Mathematics began to seem too much like puzzle solving. Physics is puzzle solving, too, but of puzzles created by nature, not by the mind of man. - Maria G. Mayer

I was thrown out of college during my freshman year, for cheating on my metaphysics final - I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. - Woody Allen

If it's green, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it has numbers, it's math. If it doesn't work, it's technology. - Unknown

When I walk down the street in New York, the building constructor, the guy pounding cement and what not, will yell, "Hey, you hockey puck!" - Don Rickles


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27-Mar-2017