Canadian Math

Disclaimer: hockey puck velocity may vary from rink to rink



Canadian Math Problem

In classical mechanics, linear momentum or translational momentum is the
product of the mass and velocity of an object.
In Canada, p=mv where p=puck, m=movement (as in towards an octopus), and v=velo city (in Newfoundland, eh)

QuotaBills
College is a refuge from hasty judgment. - Robert Frost

Mathematics: the only subject that counts. - Unknown

I go to school the youth to learn the future. - Robert Frost

Canada is the homeland of equality, justice and tolerance. - Kim Campbell

Mathematics is the science which uses easy words for hard ideas. - James Roy Newman

Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other. - Edmund Burke

You have to know a man awfully well in Canada to know his surname. - John Buchan

God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board. - Mark Twain

The greatest hockey player who ever lived: Bobby Orr, and I love him. - Donald S. Cherry

I don't want to send them to jail. I want to send them to school. - Adlai Stevenson

People know me from a hockey game, from an earthquake, from the O.J case. - Al Michaels

In mathematics, you don't understand things. You just get used to them. - John von Neumann

My goal was to play in the NHL, because that is the best hockey in the world. - Jaromir Jagr

Have you ever heard a blindfolded octopus unwrap a cellophane-covered bathtub? - Norton Juster

When God created the world, he didn't draw a line between Canada and America. - Marianne Williamson

As far as single payer, it works in Canada. It works incredibly well in Scotland. - Donald Trump

For the things of this world cannot be made known without a knowledge of mathematics. - Roger Bacon

Let us grant that the pursuit of mathematics is a divine madness of the human spirit. - Alfred Whitehead

The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness. - Robert M. Hutchins

Our team lives hockey, it dreams hockey, it eats hockey. Now if it could only play hockey. - Milton Berle

Mathematics is a game played according to certain simple rules with meaningless marks on paper. - David Hilbert

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

If I feel unhappy, I do mathematics to become happy. If I am happy, I do mathematics to keep happy. - Alfred Renyi

I had a feeling once about mathematics – that I saw it all... but it was after dinner and I let it go. - Winston Churchill

We can make fun of hockey fans, but someone who enjoys Homer is indulging the same kind of vicarious bloodlust. - Steven Pinker

Mathematics may be compared to a mill of exquisite workmanship, which grinds your stuff to any degree of fineness. - Thomas Huxley

You can go your whole life and not need math or physics for a minute, but the ability to tell a joke is always handy. - Garrison Keillor

Canada's political parties spend a few years in opposition and then govern as if it's permanent payback time. - Bob Rae

The chief reason for going to school is to get the impression fixed for life that there is a book side for everything. - Robert Frost

Mathematics is like checkers in being suitable for the young, not too difficult, amusing, and without peril to the state. - Plato

The family, that dear octopus from whose tentacles we never quite escape, nor in our innermost hearts never quite wish to. - Dodie Smith

Canada is a balloon-puncturing country. You are not really allowed to be an icon unless you also make an idiot of yourself. - Margaret Atwood

My dream is for people around the world to look up and to see Canada like a little jewel sitting at the top of the continent. - Tommy Douglas

Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok

I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today. - George Foreman

The Arc de Triomphe, the Eiffel Tower. They're monumental. They're straight out of Page 52 in your school history book. - Billy Crystal

Mathematics takes us into the region of absolute necessity, to which not only the actual word, but every possible word, must conform. - Bertrand Russell

I tell them that if they will occupy themselves with the study of mathematics they will find it the best remedy against the lusts of the flesh. - Thomas Mann

I had fried octopus last night. You have to be really quiet when you eat it. Otherwise, it emits a cloud of black smoke and falls on the floor. - Steven Wright

I was thrown out of college during my freshman year, for cheating on my metaphysics final - I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. - Woody Allen


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16-Dec-2017