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Largest Source of Internet Humour!


I love to sing and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch.

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria.
I drink too much. Last time I gave a urine sample there was an olive in it.
He can't die until the government finds a safe place to bury his liver.
I now touch nothing stronger than buttermilk: 90-proof buttermilk.
He thinks a sanitary belt means drinking booze from a clean glass.
Stiff Drink: What you get when you mix Viagra with your whiskey.
Hand Scanner: Singles bar prowler looking for wedding rings.
Who said beer won't make you smarter? It made Bud wiser.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
The first Australian beer was made out of kangaroo hops.
Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting?
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
Ladies are requested to not have children in the bar.
She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
The less teeth the women have, the better the bar.
Stagger: The shortest distance between two pints.
If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
If you drink, don't park. Accidents cause people.
Draft Dodger: Someone who avoids beer on tap.
What do you call a ballerina who works in a pub?
Drink wet cement and get completely stoned!
I can walk on water, but I stagger on alcohol.
Wine improves with age. I improve with wine.
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.
Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
I'm not as think as you drunk I am.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
Port: Fancy wine.
Margin: Mother's ruin.
I'm not aging, I'm marinating.
Express Lane: Five beers or less.
Who took the cork out of my lunch?
My drinking team has a sailing problem.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with limited inventory.

(click on the thumbnail images below to expand to full size)
Bar Walker


The Spacebar


Rainbow Beer


Hye Spirits


Booze Wedding


Long, Happy Marriage


Texas Rain Gauge


Alcohol Warning


Fixer-Uppers


Meat Loaf


Lips That Touch Liquor


Drink Refill


Redneck Post Support


Drink And Drive Directions


Alberta Hood Ornament


Husband Day Care Center


Take The Bus


Tequila Christmas Cake


Kitchen Medicine Cabinet


Ping Pong in Antarctica


Irish Drink


Tipsy Redneck


Redneck Beer Opener


Holstein or Holestein?


Heavy Drinking


One Beer A Day


White Christmas


Discrimination


Free Beer


Cruising Advice


Beach Bash


Whiskey Lurks Good


Redneck Chandelier


How Tequila Works


When Pumpkins Drink


Redneck Wine Rack


Redneck Hurricane Survival Kit


Men In Training


Beerful Church


Cheers Beer


Redneck Cooler


Waterfall Drinkers


Baby Brew


2 At A Time


Cup That Runneth Over


Master Reference Binder


Short NFL Quarterbacks


Redneck Dream Homes


Sink Drinker


Winter SOS


Light Christmas Tree


Redneck Christmas Tree


'Beer On Tap' Bike


18 Holes of Golf


Out On A Bender


Swimming Without Getting Your Hair Wet


Wine Worms


Light Beer House


Senior Protesters


Camouflage Beer Bus


Redneck Porch Hunter


Happy Hour Bike Club


Golden End of the Rainbow


Heineken Meets Star Wars


Firm Grip Glass


Nice Pets


Good To The Last Drop


World's Shortest Fairy Tale


Champagne Stick Shift


Canadian Beer Box Computer


Redneck Advent Calendar


Irish Flood


Drunk Dog


New Threat In Iraq


How To Cut Down On Your Drinking


4 Stages Of Life


Light Beer


Reserved for Drunk Drivers


CompuBrew - Beer on Tap


Thirst Quencher Fridge


Canadian Cow: Whole Stein


Brew Haul-her - 12 Brewskies At A Time


Redneck Palm Pilot


'Thinking Outside The Box' Puzzles
Find the hidden phrase or word (click on the image for the answer):

1880 Stage Coach Warning to Passengers
18 Holes of Golf
2 At A Time
4 Stages Of Life
401K Plan - Privatizing Social Security
A Head Of His Time
After Easter Bunny
Aging Without Exercise
Alberta Hood Ornament
Alberta Winter Fridge
Alcohol Research
Alcohol Warning
Another Round For The Wife, Bartender!
Are Ya Sure I'm Drunk, Officer?
Armless Man's Assistant
Aunt From Desert Storm
Aussie Definition of 'Lucky'
Aussie Gentleman
Aussie Guide Dog  (2.5M)
Aussie Whine: Best Served With Humble Pie
Australian Ghost Story
Baby Brew
Baby's First Big Bottle
Bachelor Fridge
Bar Brain - Playing Head Games
Bar Healing
Bar Walker
Bar-gain Affairs
Barcode for a Lifetime of Laughter!
Bathroom Thigns
B.C. Beer Drinkers
Beach Bash
Bear's Bud Light
Bedworthy Bartender
Beer Bottle Orchestra  (2.1M)
Beer Besting
Beer Diet
Beer Drinking Through Your Nose  (2.0M)
Beer Nuts vs. Deer Nuts
'Beer On Tap' Bike
The Beer Prayer
Beerful Church
Before 12 Beers
Beware of Black Tarmac
Bible Bar
Bier Making Oudfit - Balancin Schtatement
The Blame Game
Blessings From The Pope
Blonde Drinker
Booze Wedding
Bottle Guys
Bottomless Mug
Brew Haul-her - 12 Brewskies At A Time!
Bring Me A Beer  (1.4M)
Bring Me A Martinus
Bud Bird - Where Does He Get It?  (1.9M)
Bud Found or Bud Missing - the Neighbour's Motherlode!  (2.6M)
Bud Light Beer Bunker  (1.6M)
Bud Light Bot  (1.1M)
Bud Light Dog  (2.5M)
Bud Light's Fresh Frank Monkey  (510k)
The Buffalo Theory
Camouflage Beer Bus
Can Art
Canadian Beer Box Computer
Canadian Christmas Tree, eh!
Canadian Cow: Whole Stein
Canadian Knowledge Quiz - How Well Do You Know Canada?
Canadian Wife
Career Path Decisions
Caress-Her
Chair Skiing - Redneck Water Sport
Champagne Stick Shift
Changing Hotel Rooms
Cheers Beer
Cheap Wine Market
Choice Airlines
'Choose A Urinal' Challenge!
Christmas Cake Recipe
Cleaning Gutters With Your Friends  (2.4M)
CompuBrew - Beer on Tap
Conch Crab Special to Attract Beach Babes  (840k)
Corvette Tests to Raise The Bar
Crocodile Fans
Cruising Advice
Cuckoo Clock
Cup That Runneth Over
Danger Alert For Men
The Dangers of Veranda Smoking  (1.8M)
The Days of Our Lives: From Anticipation To Recuperation
Definition Of A Smart Ass
Deformed Spider Webs - "Toxicity Testers"
Designated Driver
Diatribe Joe-ks 4U
Dinnae Kin, Jock
Discrimination
Don't Drink And Climb
Don't Drink And Drive @ Starbucks
Don't Make Me Do It
Don't Touch My Beer  (1.3M)
Drink And Drive Directions
Drink, Don't Drive!
Drink Refill
Drink That Refreshes
Drinkers Fault-Finding Guide
Drunk Dog
Drunk Pumpkin
Efficient Micro-Surgeons
Eight Words with Male & Female Meanings
Electronic Non-Translator
Elephant Blues
Elephant Sale in a Bargain Market
Embarrassing Problem
Emu Order
Executive Management Sharp Shooter
Fairground Food
Fake Steaming Coffee Cup for Office Escapes  (1.4M)
Farmer's Daughter  (2.6M)
Fast Turtle
Feeling Inebriated?
Fiddle Duet  (3.9M)
Final Product
Firm Grip Glass
First Major Change by German Pope
First Proctologist Exam
Fish Hook Removal  (1.9M)
Fishing Trip With Jack
Fixer-Uppers
Flying Cathedral Excuse
Font Drinks @ The Bar
Free Beer
Free Cable Causes Smoking, Drinking & Weight Gain
French Connection United Kingdom T-Shirt
Friends Don't Let Good Friends Drive Drunk
George Burns Quotes
George Carlin Quotes
Gifts For The Teacher
Glacier Sasquatch Protectors - Dare to Dream!  (7.2M)
Glassway or the Highway?
God Loves Drunk People Too
Going For Gold
Going Nowhere in Ireland
Golden End of the Rainbow
Good To The Last Drop
Got Any Gwapes?
Graphic Auto Accident
Great Pub Trick
Groucho Marx Quotes
Growling Reggae Hairdo for 'No Pet' Bar Access  (2.3M)
Guess The Beer!
Guinness Record
Happy Hour Bike Club
Happy Hour in Saskatchewan
Head Games
Health Canada Warning - BARS Syndrome
Heavy Drinking
Heineken Meets Star Wars
Hell's Angels Drinkers
Henny Youngman Quotes
High Octane Hooch
Hillbilly Overalls
Holiday Fruit Cake
Holstein or Holestein?
Homer Song
House Maid For Men
How Tequila Works
How To Achieve Inner Peace
How To Cook Turkey
How To Cut Down On Your Drinking
Husband Day Care Center
Hye Spirits
I Am Canadian, eh!  (5.1M)
I  Need A Cold One Tonight ...
Instant Beer Refills - For Those Who Can't Wait
Irish Bar
Irish Drink
Irish Virgin
Irishman's Quiet Passenger
Jet Fuel Drink
Jethro's Almost Inheritance
Johnny Unitas & the Cannibal
Jose Cuervo Christmas Cookies
Karate Chop
Kitchen Medicine Cabinet
Last Call For Heaven
Late Advice
Lemon Drops
Light Beer
Light Beer House
Light Christmas Tree
Lips That Touch Liquor
Long, Happy Marriage
Male Birth Control
Male Cat  (330k)
Man Centre Fridge
Master Reference Binder
Meat Loaf
Men In Training
Monkey On Cue
Moonshine Analysis
Mr. Silent Killer Gas Passer - Real Men of Genius  (900k)
My Dream Home  (1.6M)
Nasty Poison
Need A Cigarette?
Never Drink Out Of The Same Glass
New Orleans Party Barge
New Threat In Iraq
New Wine For Seniors - Anti-Diuretic Hybrid Grape?
Newfie's Favourite Cold-Beer Cooler
Newfie Fly Groaner - Right On Cue
Newfie Happy Hour
Newfie Screech
Nice Pets
No Pets Allowed
No-Return Empire State Building Jumper
Norvegian Humour
Nothing To Correct on New Year's Day
Notice Of Revocation Of U.S. Independence
Notorious Drunk
Nun Chairs - Great Looking Legs!
Osama bin Workin
Office Refresher - Every Office Needs This
Olive Her
One Beer A Day
'One Drink A Day' Schedule
One Glass Per Day
Opinion Scale - Her Special Gift
Oscar Wilde Quotes
Ostrich Genie
Out On A Bender
Panda Bar
Passing the Bar Exam to Join The Club
Pickup A Blonde For The Boss  (480k)
Pickup Lines:     #1   #2   #3
Ping Pong in Antarctica (2.1M)
Pirate Battles
Pirate's Steering Wheel
Poker Hands
Polar Bear New Years
Police Assistant
Pour Waitress  (1.2M)
Power Outage: Don't Drink And Climb
Power Tool Buddies
Precious Cow for Dying Mother
Premiers Choice
Pressure Warning - Don't Mix Beer With Viagra
Priceless Breakfast After A Long Night
PRICELESS Trip to the ATM Machine
Public Bar Notice
Put a Bali Cork In It
Quick Wedding  (1.5M)
Rainbow Beer
Redneck Advent Calendar
Redneck Beer Drinker  (420k)
Redneck DeerBeer Hunter
Redneck Beer Opener
Redneck Birthday Cake
Redneck Chandelier
Redneck Christmas Tree
Redneck Cooler
Redneck Dog Carrier
Redneck Deer Beer Hunter
Redneck Cat Carrier
Redneck Dream Homes
Redneck Engagement Ring
Redneck's Favourite Bar Stool
Redneck Fence
Redneck's Flight Refund
Redneck Horse Sense
Redneck Hurricane Survival Kit
Redneck Ice Fishing
Redneck Meal On Wheels
Redneck Measuring Tape
Redneck Palm Pilot
Redneck Piggy Bank
Redneck Porch Hunter
Redneck Post Support
Redneck Romantic Evening Plans
Redneck Salutes the EhThens Olympics
Redneck Sanitary Belt
Redneck TV Antenna
Redneck Wind Chimes
Redneck Wine Rack
Reserved for Drunk Drivers
Restroom Thigns
Retired Golf Pros
Roadside Tragedy Turns Everyone Blue  :-(
Robo Bash by Bud Light - No Mercy  (900k)
Rodney Dangerfield Joe-ks
Romantic Hay Ride  (2.2M)
Room Service in a Texas Hotel
Rude Awakening
Saskatchewan Wind Chimes
Scottish DUI Test  (900k)
Secret For A Long, Happy Life - Her Story
Self Defense is 90% Instinct  (1.7M)
Senior Protesters
Senior Road Rage
Serious Pipe Smoker
Sermon On Alcohol
Ship's Log Book
Short NFL Quarterbacks
Silence Is Golden
Signs Of The Times
Signs That You Are Too Drunk
Sink Drinker
Skoda Limousine
Slammed Grinch
Snowball Fight - Horsing Around  (2.5M)
Soccer Squirrel  (1.8M)
Stray Bar
Stroke Study
Struggling Wife
Swimming Without Getting Your Hair Wet
Take The Bus
Take That - Personal Insults du Jour
Talking Beer Nuts
Talking Clock
Teddy Bear Passion
Tequila Christmas Cake
Terrible Lickin' @ the Belfast Pub
Texas Rain Gauge
Thanks For The Schnapps!
The Spacebar
Thirst Quencher Fridge
Thirsty Sandwich
This Drink's On Me
Thoughts On Everything
Time To Pull The Plug?
Tipsy Redneck
Tonto's Horse Coolant
Trouble Brewing, Guys...
Typical Canadian Baby Boy
Typical Males  (770/630k)
Unbeerievable Nuns
Vampire Drinks
Vat Drowning
Walk-In Fridge  (1.1M)
Walmart's Redneck Wine
Wanna Buy A Vowel? (R)
Warning: Beer Contains Female Hormones
Warning For Men: Liquid Drug Abuse
Waterfall Drinkers
Waterfront Dining
WC Fields Quotes
What A Coincidence
What A Romantic!  (2.1M)
What's He Going To Be?
When A Canadian Guy Plans The Wedding!
When Pumpkins Drink
When You Don't Offer A Pepsi - No Grazi 4U!  (2.5M)
When You Know It's Time To Quit Smoking
Whiskey Lurks Good
White Christmas
Who Wears The Pants?
Why I Didn't Show Up For Work
Why Men Shouldn't Take Messages
Why You Shouldn’t Let Your Dog Drink Beer
Wine Worms
Winter SOS
World Record Challenge
World's Shortest Fairy Tale
Worst Day Of My Life
Yoga's Balanced Lifestyle

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