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Lawyer Joe-ks
joe-ks.com
Largest Source of Internet Humour!
99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
“Please
don't hit me - my lawyer's in jail.”
“Where
there's a will, I want to be in it.”
“Justice: A decision in
your favour.”
“Lawyer
says client is not that guilty.”
“Paying
alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.”
“I
was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.”
“Going
to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat.”
It’s better to be tried by twelve men than to be carried by six.
“People
who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either one being made.”
“What
the large print giveth, the small print taketh away.”
“Laws
are like cobwebs which may catch small flies, but let wasps and hornets break
through.”
“Some
circumstantial evidence is very strong, as when you find a trout in the milk.”
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
On a bill from lawyer, typed by his secretary: Bull rendered: $500.
Grand Jury: One that say, "Not Guilty."
Lawyer: A cat who settles disputes between mice.
“Man
minus ear waives hearing.”
“Satisfaction
guaranteed or your honey back.”
“Judge Not Convinced
Murder Victim is Still Alive”
“Lawyer Calls Soul As
Witness”
“Lawyers Give Poor Free
Legal Advice”
“Your
Honour, you’re crazy!” said Tom judgmentally.
How do law students date?
What do you call a place where a law student lives?
If Adam and Eve were alive today, they would probably sue the snake.
Lawyers are like beavers: They get in the middle of the stream and dam it up.
Testimoney: Fees paid to expert witnesses.
What kind of clothes do attorneys wear?
Law
Lawyer
Legal
Why was the Tupperware salesman ruled out as a murder suspect?
Counsel: Advice with a price tag.
Divorce Court: A hall of blame.
Receiver: An official appointed by the court to take what's left.
Shyster: The other fellow's lawyer.
Supine: What the lawyer did after he ran into the tree.
Why did the blueberry need a lawyer?
How is a judge like an English teacher?
Don't tell my mother I'm a lawyer - she thinks I'm a hooker.
Under the English legal system you are innocent until proven to be Irish.
The trouble with our laws these days is that the criminals know their rights
better than their wrongs.
(click on the thumbnail images below to
expand to full size)
You Want Change?

Wizard of Oz - 2008

Lehman Brothers Protest

Best Fairy Tale

Legal Grounds

Headline Stories

2008 Cereal

Infringement Notice - New Zealand Cracker

Democrat Gift

Go Dawgs!

Divorce Defined

Ancient Politician

Trial Process in China

12 Days of Christmas - Gifts By Mail
12
Days of Christmas - Government Economizing Measures
2003 Stella
Award Candidates
2008 Cereal

Alien Smuggling: How's Your
Claustrophobia?
Alimony Settlement From Above
Ancient Politician
The
Ant And The Grasshopper - Canadian & U.S. Versions
Arkansas
Divorce Application
Aspiring Lawyer
Fails Bar Exam
Atheist Holiday
Attending To Business
Baked Democrat
Best Fairy Tale

Bizarre Murder Mystery
Border Smuggler
Build A Better Bush
Case of the Pregnant Lady
Children’s Bill
of Rights
Clever Lawyer -
Defendant Parts
Client Part-Time Billing
Come-Back Line Of The Year
Communication Divorce
Contract Spec Writer's Night
Before Christmas
Contractor Bids
Copyright
Country Dee-Vorce
Court
Martial at 5:00
Crazy Laws
Criminal Assistance
CSI China (1.6M)
Cure for Child Abuse
Dedicated Manager - Wife or Mistress?
Defamation of Character
DeLorean Coke Dealer
Democrat Gift
Difference Between a Convict and a Lawyer
Distasteful
Lawyer
Divorce Cake
Divorce Defined
Divorce Is Grand
Don’t Mess With A Newfie
Dumb
Dubm Things Said In Court
Dying Request
Early
Christmas Shopping
Engineer Improvements
in Hell
Ex-Lawyer
Plumber
Fair Trial
Feeling Sorry
For Another Corrupt Politician?
First Divorce Related To Sept.
11th Terrorist Attacks
Florida Ballot
Florida Voters
are Ready for 2004
Football
Players Will
Free Cable
Causes Smoking, Drinking & Weight Gain
Freudian Slips
Generous Judge's Divorce Settlement
Generous Lawyer
Go Dawgs!
Golf Ball Resort
The Good, Bad and Ugly
Harassment or Discrimination?
Headline Stories

Heart Attack
Heavenly Matrimony
Hijacked Plane Full of Lawyers
Hillary's First Night As President
Honest
Lawyer
Horse Mate: Triple Crown Foals
How Cold Is
It?
How Much Is A Billion to a Canadian Politician?
How To Upgrade A Speeding Ticket
(4.8M)

Improving Emergency Response Time (ERT)
Inadmissible Court Evidence
In-Debted For Life
Infringement Notice - New Zealand Cracker
Inspirational Quotes
Interruptus Unexpectus
I.R.S. Humor
Jailed Requests
Johnny Cochran's Last Words - Farewell to O.J.
Judge-mental Lawyers
Kid's Groaners
Land Title Process in New Orleans
Last Call
Lawyer Commits
Insurance Fraud With Box of Cigars?
Lawyer Expands Practice
Lawyer
Floods
Lawyer Joe-ks
Lawyer Pays Back Debt
Lawyer Priorities
Lawyer Questions
Lawyer’s 4-Day
Express Degree
Lawyer’s Genie-ous Catch
Lawyer's Season’s Greetings
Lawyer’s Valentine
Gift
Legal Assistance
Legal Bribe
Legal Charge for Guilty Clients
Legal Grounds

Legal Speak
Night Before Christmas
Lehman Brothers Protest

Let My People Go - Debt Free
Liberal Dose of Lie-Clocks
Lie Clock

Mammogram Appointment
Memphis Senator Needs Fixin'
Merits of Good Advice
Mike Rowe
vs. Microsoft Dough-main Lawsuit?
Nag, Nag, Nag
Negotiating Lawyers
Negotiations in Israel
Newspaper Bloopers
Norvegian Groaners
Not Guilty?
Nutcracker Suite - Chinese Version
Off The Record Tastes
OJ Book Signing
Old Divorce
Old People Never Die, They Just...
One Way Ticket To Mars
Passing the Bar Exam to Join The Club
Pedestrian Lawyers
Perfect Divorce
Phone Call Four Wilson

Physicians Advised to Avoid Slang
PoliSpeek
Political Promise Transporter
Politically Correct Night
Before Christmas
Reduced Sentence Execution
Religious-Based Divorce
Repeat Offender
Returning the Stinky House to the Ex-Wife
Roe vs. Wade - 2005
Santa's
Lawsuit - Violation of Children's Rights
Sausage
Consultation
Second Choice Politician
Shark Law Office
Simultaneous Hunters
Skydiving Lawyers
Skydiving Politicians
Small Town Law
Smart Hunting Dog
Soon-To-Be Ex-Wife
Speeding Back To School
St. Peter's Politics
Texas Divorce
Think Like A Lawyer
This
Drink's On Me
Tiny Writing Record Holder
Train Lantern
Trial Process in China
Two Cow Politics
Two Plus Two
Valentine One Liners
Violinists Suing: More Money for More Notes
Voting Outhouse - Where All Voters 'Go'
"Was" His Car
Weird Product
Warnings
What Will I Wear For Court Today?
What's He Going To Be?
Whose Profession Came First?
Wife's Remote Revenge
Will He
Remember?
Will Made for Nird and Ird
Will Power
Wizard of Oz - 2008

Women Get Frustrating As They Grow Older
You Want Change?

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