Home
Newest
Captions
SuDoku
SuJoku
FAQ
GR8 Links
RSS Feed
Playlist
Feedback
Subscribe
Get_Stuffed
Book Titles
Daffynitions
Riddles
License PL8s
Bumper_S
LittleJohnny
Signing
Signs
Puntastic
Credits
Affiliates
WorldRecord1
WorldRecord2

Aging
Air
Anagrams
Animals
Anniversary
Aptonyms
Archives
Army
Art
Babies
Bad Gas
Bald
Bar
Barber
Bathroom
Birthday
Bizarre
Blonde
Bloopers
Book Titles
Box
Bumper_S
Business
Calendar
Camping
Canada
Captions
Cars
Chemistry
Christmas
Clothing
College
Computer
Confucius
Country
CRAPP
Daffynitions
Diatribe
Diet
Dining
Do It With
Doctor
Dubm
Embassy
Emergency
Engineers
Engrish
Entertaining
Euphemisms
Family
FAQ
Farm
Feminist
Finance
Firemen
Firsts
Fishing
Food
Fortune
Friends
Games
Genies
Golf
Government
GR8 Links
Heaven
Hikers
History
Holidays
Homerisms
Hospital
Hotel
House
Hunting
Illusions
Inspiration
Invitation
Kid'n Me
KnockKnock
Language
Lawyers
License PL8s
Lightbulb
LittleJohnny
Lottery
Marriage
Mechanical
Medical
Mennonite
Military
mondegreens
Motorcycle
Murphy
Music
Nationality
Natives
New_Years
Newest
Newfie
Newlyweds
News
Nurse
Office
Olympics
Ouch
Oxymorons
Palindromes
Pangrams
Phrases
Playlist
Police
Politics
Ponder
Practical
Prison
Puns
Puntastic
Puzzles
Quotes
Rednecks
Relationships
Religious
Restaurant
Riddles
Roasts
RSS Feed
Safety
Scenery
School
Security
Shopping
Signing
Signs
Slogans
Space
Spoof
Sports
Stats
Stress
SuDoku
SuJoku
Survivors
Telephone
Television
Terrorists
Theater
Toasts
Tombstone
Tom Swifties
Travel
Twisters
Union
Weather
Wedding
Whys?
Work
WorldRecord1
WorldRecord2
Yo Mama

Marriage  Joe-ks
joe-ks.com
Largest Source of Internet Humour!

Google
 



All men are animals, some just make better pets.
Driver carries no cash - he's married.
One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn,
got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

My wife is a sex object. Every time I ask for sex, she objects.
Marriage is not a word. It's a sentence.
My wife ran away with my best friend. I sure miss him.
My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her - or something like that.

My wife and I were happy for twenty years... then we met.
First of all you've got to have talent. And then you've got to marry her.

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Behind every successful man is a woman... Behind her is his wife.
I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck.
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
When a man opens the car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.
When a man’s wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to him.
The gifts you buy your wife are never as apropos as the gifts your neighbour buys his wife.
Marriage is the mourning after the knot before.
Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
Nest egg or goose egg - depends on the chick you marry...
If a man has enough horse sense to treat his wife like a thoroughbred, she will never turn into an old nag.
Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?
If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try doing it like your wife told you to do it?
Mr. and Mrs. Sleyman have lied most of their married life in Hartford.
They were married and lived happily even after.
He was so lazy that he married a pregnant woman.
She had been married so many times that she had rice marks on her face.
For two people in a marriage to live together day after day is unquestionably the only miracle the Vatican has overlooked.
Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and just give her a house.
The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you.
Knewlyweds: Second marriage for both.
Listless: What men become when their wives don't give them a list.
Marriage License: A noose paper.
Shady Character: A fellow who snoozes in a hammock under a tree while his wife mows the lawn.
Siren: What a woman looks like before marriage and sounds like after.
Tub: What you turn into after you get married and no longer feel the need to watch your weight.
Apocalipstick: What your wife found on your shirt collar just before she kicked you out of the house.
Love Letter: A noose paper.
Who leads the wedding party when two bakers marry?
I never knew what happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late.
A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's. She changes it more often.
Where do vegetables go to get married?
 

(click on the thumbnail images below to expand to full size)
3 Stages Of A Man's Life

Looka But Don't Touch

'How Far Apart' Bed

My Ex-Wife, The Pilot

Digital Love

Love Not Knot

Biker Love

Romance Lost

Woman's Remote

Mink Love

Man Of The House

Wrap Around Towel

Joe's ‘Dear Abby’ Page

Living With A Blonde

Hyphenated Names

Good Morning Babushka

Divorce Defined

Camouflage Couch

Alaska Marriage License

Female & Male Brains  (pps)

Soured Love

Just Married Geek

World's Shortest Fairy Tale

Man Of The Year Finalists

Hunter's Dream Wedding

Bag Hang-Up

Dear Crossing

The Good Wife's Guide

Wedding Cake For The Submissive Husband


It's Safe To Come Out Now, Honey

2005 British Royal Flush Wedding
2005 Marriage Wisdom
2030 News Flash for the U.S.
3 Stages Of A Man's Life 

40th Wedding Anniversary Wish
6-Year-Old’s Wedding Plans
A Free Ride: $10 is $10!
A Man Is Like A Deck of Playing Cards
A Man's Wish
A Mother's Love

A Real Man's Moment Of Clarity  (3.7M)
A Woman's Mind
A Woman's Poem
Aardvark Marriage Insurance
Addition to the Periodic Table of Elements
Advantages of Mothers Milk
Advice From Women To Men
Afterlife Life

Alaska Marriage License
Alimony Settlement From Above
Amish Elevator View

An In-fluential Love Story
Anyone Without Sin?
Apples and Wine - Picked or Stomped?
Application For Permission To Date My Daughter

Are They Hormone or Hermoan Pills?
Arguing With Your Wife

Arkansas Divorce Application

Arrival Greetings From Iraq

As You Slide Down The Banister Of Life
Assertive Husband
Attention Get-her
Aunt Emma’s Family?
Aussie Rules Football - Season Ticket

Backwards Country Song
Bag Hang-Up
Bagged Husband
Bank of Newfie Scotia ATM Instructions
Barb-ed Wire Relationship
Beautiful and Stupid Wife

Beautiful Bride - "In-dentured" For Life
  (580k)

Bedside Non-Assistance
Bedtime Bliss
Best Men Joe-ks
Better With Viagra
Betting on the Wrong Horse
Big Portion Postcard Delivery
Biker Love 

Birding Skills 101
Birth Control Pill For Men
Black Baby in Maternity
Blonde Mother's Marriage Advice
Blonde Snow Removal Parking

Blonde's Surprise Pregnancy

Born to be Blind  (2.4M) 

Bow Tie Syndrome
Boyfriend Remote
Bra Size Religion

Brain Transplant
Brains:     Female   Male  
Female & Male Brains  (pps)
Brand Name Relationship Recognition
Breast Implant Breakthrough
Bride & Groom Brooms

Bring Me A Beer  (1.4M) 

Bring Someone Else Home

Broken Lawn Mower – Husband Chores
Buy a Bikini or an All-In-One?
Buy Her Something Electric

Buy Her Something Expensive

Camouflage Couch
Canadian Wife
Career Path Decisions

Celebrate Womanhood!
Chances of a Man Winning an Argument
Cheap Gift
Cheap Perfume
Children
Chinese Request

Church Moments  (2.7M)

Classes For Men

Cleaning Gutters With Your Friends  (2.4M)
Closet Cell Call  (3.1M)
Cold Hearted Women @ The Pearly Gates
Communication Divorce
Complicated Woman
Computer Mice For Women:     #1  #2
Computer Women
Computerholic’s ‘Dear John’ Letter
Cockney Bride Selection
Congratulations On Your New Baby!

Control Your Anger

Cosmetic Surgery - Wife's Choice
Country Dee-Vorce

Couples Tub Toilet - For Newleyweds

Covers Keep Coming Off?

Cow Golf

Cowboy's Wedding Night

Crisco

Crochet Doll Collection 

Cuckoo Clock
Cure For Fingernail Biting
Danger Alert For Men

Dark In Here
Day Of Leisure

Dear Crossing
Dear John
Dedicated Manager - Wife or Mistress?
Delays

Diary of a Snow Shoveler

Did She Say Yes?

Diet Doctor To The Rescue
Diet Protection Plan
The Difference Between Men and Women:     Men   Women
Differences Between Male and Female

Digital Love 

Divorce Cake

Divorce Defined

Divorce Is Grand

Do You Think She Talks Too Much?
Doctor'ed Birthday Cake

Doctor’s Advice for Husband’s Survival
Downloaded Kid

Duct Tape Rules - New Meaning for “Hangover”

Dusty Underwear

Dynamite Cure For Emptying The Outhouse

Early Reservations

Efficiency Expert’s Home Advice
Eight Words with Male & Female Meanings
Elderly Pre-Nups

Email Gone Astray - Meeting Your Wife Earlier Than Expected?
Emergency Chores for the Spouse
Encyclopedia For Sale - Just Married

Engaged For Life
ESP Cheque Book Reconciliation
Ethel's Public Appearance: Kettle Calling The Pot Black?
Evolution of Authority

The Evolution of Man & Woman
Excited Gorilla
Exercise Helps Pregnancy
Expensive Cosmetics
Expired Marriage

Extravagant Scottish Expenses
Eye Examination Chart

Failed Logistics Exam

Farmer's Pond Advice for Youngsters
Father's Day "Must Have" Power Drill  (970k)

Female & Male Brains  (pps)
"Female Speak" Translation
Fence Nails
The First Couple
First Divorce Related To Sept. 11th Terrorist Attacks
First Fight
Fishing Chores
Fix The Outhouse, Pa!
Floral Apology

Florida's Retired Bikers
Flowchart of Romance  (pps)
Flower Show
Food For Grief and Suffering
For Services Rendered

‘For The Dog’ Bowl
For Those Who Love Their Partner  (1.3M)
For Women Only
French Kissing - Wise Advice

Freudian Slips

Fried Eggs
Generic Apology

Generous Judge's Divorce Settlement
George Burns Quotes
Getting Fit At 50
Give Her A Diamond, Moroff
Give Her Crabs For Christmas!

Glass Eye
Going To Havaii
The Golden Years:     #1   #2
Golf Honeymoon
Gone With The Wind
Gonna Be A Bear Next Time
Good Advice
The Good, Bad and Ugly

Good Morning Babushka
The Good Wife's Guide
Groom Broom
Groucho Marx Quotes
Guy Rules
Happiest Day of His Life
Happy Men Rules

Hard Of Hearing
Having A Wonderful Hawaii Wish
Hazardous Materials Data Sheet for Woman
He Loves Me ... He Loves Me Not

Hearse Lineup

Heart Attack

Heaven Can Weight
Heavenly Matrimony

Help For The Snoring Husband

Help Me Before It's Too Late

Henny Youngman Quotes
Henpecked Husband
Here's To Not Missing You
Hidden Remote

High School Reunion
Hillary's Baby

His and Her Garages

Historical Wife
Hold On Tight

“Hold These” Golf Clubs
Honesty As Best Policy

Honey, What's For Supper?

Hospital Outpatient Assistance - Like It Or Not
Hospital Twin Bill

Hot Summer Night Cure
House Maid For Men
House Rules

Housework Helping Husband
Housework Quotes

'How Far Apart' Bed 

How Many Women Can A Man Marry?

How Men Talk To Their Wives  (900k)

How Not To Cut Your Wife's Hair

How To Handle Problems With Women

How To Live A Long & Happy Life  (2.5M) 

How To Lose Weight For The New Year

How To Microwave Soup  (390k)
How To Reduce Symptoms of PMS  (1.1M)
How To Shower

How To Spot A Rich Guy
How To Tell If You've Got What It Takes, Men
How To Treat A Girl

Hunter's Dream Wedding
Husband Has Arrived
Husband Makes Diving Home Entrance
Husband Mart
Husbands And Wives

Husband's Last Bathroom Suggestion

Husband's Leftovers

Husband's Revenge  (3.6M) 

Hyphenated Names
Hypothermia or Heart Attack… Heavenly Entrance
I  Love Her, But ...
I  Need A Cold One Tonight ...

If Men Did Housework

If They Married...
I'm The Boss!

The Importance of Correct Punctuation

Indian Wife

Infrequent Marriage Proposal

Inspirational Quotes

Insur-Ann-ce Policy Cancellation
International Sign of Marriage

Interruptus Unexpectus

Irish Birth Control 

Irishman’s Quiet Passenger
Is She - or the Car - For Sale?
Is That Your Final Answer?

It's OK To Come Out Now, Honey

It's The Thought That Counts
Jethro's Almost Inheritance
Jewish Mother-In-Law
Joan Rivers Quotes
Joe's ‘Dear Abby’ Page

July 7, 2007: Special Wedding Date

Just A Weeeeeee Bit
Just In Time

Just Married Geek
Just One More Fart
Just One More Thing Before You Go...
Keep The Lid Down!
Kids Komments
Lack Of Interest

Ladies - You 'Can' Order Your Perfect Man!

Last Request
Late Advice

Laura Swenson Quotes

Laying Down the Ground Rules in the House
Lazy Spouses
Lemon Picker
Let My People Go - Debt Free
Life's A Test
Life's Little Secrets<