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Yo Mama
| |
joe-ks.com
151.
Kid
Kars
A.
Irvin Kauffman: Pole
Position in the 'Rat Race'
B.
Mark Prairie: This
would be FUN, if I could get this thing to go FORWARD!'
C.
Doug Brown: A
New Age Harry Potter
D.
Idske Mulder: Boat-orized
Blades
E.
Rich Grogan: Stop
sign? Stop sign! BRAKES!!!, Where
is the stop button?
& I
may regret not getting knee pads.
F.
Kirk Lowry: Brakes...
next time... add... BRAKES!!!
G.
Martin Bridgland: It's
my nimbus 2007
H.
Della Norton: Please..
.Please... Please... Don't let that be a pothole up ahead..., Steering
wheel is optional.
& I
hope this thing runs out of gas soon. My hands are getting cramped.'
152.
The
Joe-kster's Dentist
A.
Kirk Lowry: As
if a trip to you guys wasn't bad enough.
B.
Cherei McCarter: Redneck
Dentist and a woman too? Holy toledo, Batman... I need the batmobile right
away... YIPES!
C.
Idske Mulder: Never
down in the mouth with Dental Clown Care!
D.
Rick Miksell: This
is what your mouth will look like when I get done.
E.
Mark Prairie: Too
much gas can make you Goofy!
F.
Maureen Kennerk: At
least she's not wearing MASK SCARE-A.
G.
Irvin Kauffman: Two
Chiclets to soothe that dry, raw mouth!
H.
Claire Shriver: Do
you actually think I'm going to open my mouth now?
153.
Watermelon
Bocce
A.
Karen Moore: 7-pin
bowling in the Urals - Unbowlievable!
B.
Maureen Kennerk: It's
ALLEYmentary my dear Watson! - Alimentary!
C.
Mark Prairie: Unclear
on the concept of bowling, the Villagers wait patiently for the next earthquake.
D.
Idske Mulder: Paintbowling,
the latest sport: a combination of Paintball and Bowling, now 'bowling' over
from the highest regions!
E.
Barry K, The Big Kahuna: I
hope it doesn't 'download' in the middle of an 'upload'... if the batteries go
dead?
154.
Redneck
Barbecue
A.
Phoebe Moll: Stainless
steel barbecue doubles as a spittoon!
B.
Martin Grosse: Bubba's
new High-Pot cooking stove.
C.
Irvin Kauffman: Mountain
Oysters, Anyone?
D.
Kirk Lowry: Why
yes, I only use organic materials to cook with!, Man,
this tastes like crap.
& Methane-power
comes to your town! See store for details.
E.
Ivan Cobb: Jeez
Ma, I don't know what yer cookin', but it smell's like crap!
F.
Mark Prairie: When
coals are ready, place pork butt on grill., Cold
Weather Commode
& Smokey
the Bear says, 'Only YOU can prevent toilet fires. Close the lid!'
G.
Idske Mulder: Say
hon', how many carbon tablets did you take yesterday for your B.M.?
H.
Mrs Brown: If
the chilli didn't kill you, the after burn will!
I.
Barry K, The Big Kahuna: Before
we start...?! DON'T 'ANYONE' EVEN THINK ABOUT PUSHING THAT SMALL SILVER LEVER ON
THE SIDE! We got that?, Well
would you lookie there - A 'CANNED' BBQ!, Time
to eat, let us pray, 'Hail Mary, full of grace... grab your fork and stuff your
face.', When
everyone saw his new BBQ, they all looked a little... 'FLUSHED'...,
& Um-m-m...
excuse me? I'd like to ask a little question? I have to go to the bathroom
now...!?
J.
Keith Tyson: Hot
cross buns
K.
James Santos: Grate
Crapper!
L.
Della Norton: Does
it comes with a 'flush the fat' system?
& You
too can own your own handy dandy newest porcelin Geoge Foreman Grill.
M.
Scott Kovalik: Dude...
Your Burgers taste like Crap!
N.
Kyle Ziegler: Introducing
the FART n Start Grill!
155.
Wrap
Around Text
A.
Mark Prairie: It's
just the paperboy honey. I'll take care of it!
B.
Kirk Lowry: Taking
a love for reading to new levels., Levar
Burton and the shocking 'Reading Rainbow' scandal..., Love
a good book?
& Penthouse
Letters will never be the same again!
C.
Irvin Kauffman: Words
fail me...
& It'll
never sell, the writing is too personal!
D.
Kathy Williams: Just
reach out and touch someone... with a heartfelt letter.
E.
Rhiannyn Grahame: Let
the words surround and captivate you.
& Embrace
the story to become part of it.
F.
Andrea Sif Jσnsdσttir: A
student who embraces the written word.
& His
words just reached out and grabbed me.
G.
Idske Mulder: Since
she fell in love, she's all wrapped up in writing.
& Can't
get a word in edgewise...
H.
Mike Trimble: It
must be Love - it's written all over your face!
Caption Winner!
I.
Mrs Brown: Hmmmm!
NOW for spell check..., Mr
Write, What
a novel relationship they have!
& A
picture is worth one thousand words.
J.
Samantha Moore: I
Love Reading; Reading Loves Me.
K.
MG Chimaera: Sometimes
Words Are Not Enough
L.
Barry K, The Big Kahuna: This
isn't what they call... 'POETIC LICENCE", is it?
& I'm
touched... Truly touched. I, I have no words to express... But, there's just far
too many spelling errors here... the relationship just won't last!
M.
Clark Gibson: Embracing
words
N.
Bill Mielniczuk: A
writer totally
wrapped
up
in her work!
O.
Rick Brennecke: You
must be a hard copy.
P.
Danica Skirly: Everyone
has a story to tell.
Satellite Dish, this is getting ridiculous.
Q.
Vincent Edwards: Letters:
For Lover's Who Can't Afford a Cell Phone or DSL Hook Up
R.
Mike Rothwell: And
one more thing my love... If I die in this stupid war, please give the enclosed
letter to our daughter when she turns 18. Love, me.
S.
Dave Westwood: Love
Story...
T.
Della Norton: Who
said poetry can't reach out and touch someone?
& It
was the love of reading rainbow that got her started.
& See
I told you that when you look closer the 3D image appears. So real you can reach
out and touch it...
U.
Pat Dooley: Like
poetry and a novel, thousands of words can be spoken, but sometimes, all we
really need, is a hug...
V.
Tim Paul: I
care about the living word.
156.
Hang
On To That Thought
A.
Karen Moore: This
house is a mirror image of what it used to be.
B.
Matt Sullivan: Darn
Windows 'Vista' Upgrade!!!
C.
Kirk Lowry: Yeah,
I'm gettin' the hang of it., Relocating
made easy! Call now, and you'll also receive...
& Yeah,
the neighborhood was going to hell in a handbasket, but then I figured out how
to turn that all around!
D.
Idske Mulder: Don't
forget this is really a flat when you step outside!
E.
Mrs Brown: 'Meow?'
translation: 'OK! Where IS that breeze coming from then?', 'Meow!
Meeeeooow!' translation: 'Great! More access to the great outdoors to go potty!', Snow
in the middle of Summer? Ozone friendly air conditioning.
& What
did we move for? It sure wasn't for the view, THAT'S just the same!
F.
Barry K, The Big Kahuna: I
keep tellin' ya people, it's an 'INSIDE JOB'! No, i'ts an 'Outside-In' job. No,
it's ALL Inside-Out!, Hm-m-m
? What would happen if I put them in the floor... or the ceiling?, Oh-h
oh-h-h....the neighbors Pit Bull can see Tinker, it's running over!, Honey,
come help. Which goes where? And where's the flippin' instructions?, Oh
my! Another 'Room With a View'.
& Bob,
this is freakin' me out! I still can't find 'THE FRIGGIN DOOR'!
G.
Clark Gibson: Just
Hanging Out
H.
Mark Prairie: These
"preview" windows are a real pane in the glass!'
I.
Irvin Kauffman: Okay,
OK... put the freeze-dried cat where?
J.
Rick Brennecke: Where
should I put this window, so the cat can't look out it?
K.
James Santos: Inspiration:
The cat's named Microsoft...
L.
Della Norton: No...
No... No... Master, please put that on the south wall.
& I'm
begging you - don't put it there...
157.
Childhood
Romance
A.
Darrel Riffle: That
kid's just gross! He blew his nose on me the other day too!
B.
Mark Prairie: Later,
Little Bill would learn to play the saxophone and eventually become President.
C.
Idske Mulder: So
what, I'm laughing on the wrong side of my mouth!
& He's
kissing on the wrong side of his head!
D.
Irvin Kauffman: Where's
MY stamp?
& Cut,
CUT, the kid's holding hands with herself!
E.
David Duncan: I
can feel something happening... Yes! You're sucking my teeth out too!
F.
Rick Brennecke: You're
not kissing me anymore lover, you have boy germs!
G.
Paul Bottel: Darn
that Betty Sue. She didn't care about Billy at all until I told her I liked him.
Now, look at her, the little fluzzie.
H.
Della Norton: Wait
till I tell my Mommy on you.
& Ohhhh...
You wait till you are alone by the swings.
158.
Invisible
Motorcycle Race
A.
Irvin Kauffman: Zen
- and the Art of Air Hockey
B.
Kirk Lowry: Note
to self: tell mess-hall, no more Mexican food., As
soon as Democrats get out of Congress, we expect to get our motorcycles!
& So,
what would YOU do for a Klondike Bar?
C.
Idske Mulder: The
real airborne troops.
D.
Patrick Koch: Flying
monkey first airborne preparing for take off.
E.
Jack Porcenaluk: And
when you get up there, switch to the 'V' formation.
F.
Mark Prairie: Chinese
troops practice for 100 meter simultaneous jump-rope competition.
G.
Candace Tori: Featuring
our new 'Mind Over Matter' Matrix school.
Caption Winner!
H.
Floyd Barker: The
new Chinese Stealth Troop Transport had only one bug left in it.
& Now
here's discipline, I said 'squad halt' half an hour ago.
I.
Heath Young: These
are the new workout routines for the military after watching all the Harry
Potter movies.
J.
Della Norton: Gentleman...
Start your engines..., I
didn't see this one coming... Neither did anyone else..., The
saying is 'white men can't jump'. Nothing was said about the Chinese..., When
I say jump, you don't ask how high. Just jump.
& Auditions
for the flying monkeys in the Wizard Of Oz.
K.
Renι: See,
white men can't jump...
L.
Tim Paul: No,
I will not sit on the toilet seat...
M.
Howard Chapman: Chinese
land mine locator unit in action.
159.
Sandal
Sale
A.
Phil Forde: Leather
sale. See what you can do with just a little bit of ingenuity. The other one
reads Ends.
B.
Irvin Kauffman: Latest
mini-skirt accessory for hard times! |