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What would you get if you put butter on your mattress?
 
What rises and waves all day?
 
How can you tell a tourist in New York?
 
What does a sheep put over a lightbulb?
 
What is no higher than the ground, yet you can't jump over it?
 
What has ears but can't hear a thing?
 
How do you make a horse fast?
 
What is a ringleader?
 
Why didn't the fireplace burn too well?
 
What's the angriest part of a goal?
 
I'm full of people but no one's inside. What am I?
 
I run all day long but never leave your house. What am I?
 
What do you get if you cross a bike and a rose?
 
Which is the largest sea?
 
Where do Siamese twins sleep?
 
What do you call a knife that cuts four loaves of bread at a time?
 
Why is my wife a magnetic person?
 
Why did the turtle take assertiveness training?
 
What type of shirt should oarsmen yachters wear?
 
How do you turn a beagle into a bird?
 
What has eight wheels but carries only one passenger?
 
What has a neck but no head?
 
What's round on both sides and high in the middle?
 
Why does time fly?
 
What is the weather forecast for Afghanistan?
 
I have a bed but no sheets or pillows. What am I?
 
What's the difference between a rich man and a poor man?
 
From what kind of dish does a car eat?
 
Where do children grow?
 
What do you lose every time you stand up?
 
Where can you find misleading books?
 
From what dairy do people in the Sahara Desert get their milk?
 
What is the hungriest part of a goal?
 
What do you call wood that has nothing to play with?
 
What does the richest person in the world make for dinner every night?
 
Why are diapers like $20 bills?
 
How can you place a pencil on the floor so that no one can jump over it?
 
What is the puppet show for senior citizens?
 
What makes a road broad?
 
What bird resembles a toupée?
 
What glass buildings do Canadians like best?
 
What is the biggest jewel in the world?
 
What do you call people who watch other people diet?
 
What can you serve but never eat?
 
How do you charge a battery?
 
Where do timid farmers sit at a lamb auction?
 
Which vegetable goes bad the quickest?
 
Why do bankers go to art school?
 
What's a computer's favourite junk food?
 
Who changed King Tut's diapers?
 
Where can you always find health, wealth and happiness?
 
What happened when a couple tried to kiss in dense fog?
 
Why are lions holy creatures?
 
Spell extra wise in two letters.
 
What speaks every language but never went to school?
 
Why did the house call for a Doctor?
 
What country makes you shiver?
 
What cat sells wood?
 
When is it safe to touch a lion?
 
What is the biggest thing that can get through a lock?
 
How do you top a car?
 
What's round and mean?
 
How can you tell twin witches apart?
 
What letter is always surprised?
 
I am forever, and yet was never. What am I?
 
What ant lives in a house?
 
What type of snake is good at sums?
 
Why does a dog dress warmer in summer than in winter?
 
What has a man's name, is as small as a mouse, and wears a red jacket?
 
What do you call a Star Wars soft drink?
 
When is the invisible man visible?
 
What kind of Indians does Dracula like?
 
What do you call a flying ape?
 
If a lawyer slipped and hurt himself at a pool, what kind of case would he have?
 
How do you make a hot dog shiver?
 
What fish have the worst odor?
 
Why do bakers always need dough?
 
What happens when corn catches a cold?
 
What does a messy flea need?
 
How does taking a ferry boat change people for the worse?
 
What is the best way to kill time?
 
How do you turn a sparrow into a weapon?
 
What kind of raft melts in water?
 
What is everyone in the world doing at the same time?
 
What tree has many friends?
 
What ship praises God?
 
What is two-thirds of a pun?  or  What do skunks and partial puns have in common?
 
What kind of toys does a psychiatrist's child play with?
 
What do bees brush their hair with?
 
What star is dangerous?
 
What best-selling book can you purchase at a Christian bookstore?
 
How many feet are in a yard?
 
What kinds of stockings to baseball players like to wear?
 
What metal do robbers use to break into houses?
 
Is Helena Nome?
 
What kind of pool has no water?
 
What is very dark yet has done the most to enlighten the world?
 
Where is the best place to look for a helping hand?
 
What is the poorest plant?
 
Do you know how long goats should be milked?
 
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