QuotaBillsPayday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling
Liquor Store: A stupor market - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King
Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown
I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn
Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb
Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood
Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
Beer: The method of turning grain into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson
I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart
There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson
If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu
It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst
Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley
I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields
A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I
Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson
I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown
Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson
We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano
A raise is like a martini: it elevates the spirit, but only temporarily. - Dan Seligman
I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown
To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson
I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov
Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown
When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument. - C.S. Forester
Wine makes a man more pleased with himself. I do not say it makes him more pleasing to others. - Samuel Johnson
I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.
Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson
Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie
Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin
The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker
You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott
A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke
Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown
When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway
If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster