#1 humor site on the 'net

Chocolate Math for 2020

Guessing your age through chocolate

Chocolate Math for 2020 thanks to Karen Moore

[This is pretty neat how it works out... DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST... It takes less than a minute... Work this out as you read... Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out...]

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate (try for more than once but less than 10) ...

2. Multiply this number by 2 ...

3. Add 5 ...

4. Multiply it by 50. I'll wait while you get the calculator ...

5. If you have already had your birthday this year, add 1770 *; If you haven't, add 1769 *...

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born ...

You should have a three digit number ...

The first digit of this was your original number (i.e. how many times you want to have chocolate each week) ...

The next two numbers equal ...


* Number dependent on Year

There is no royal road to geometry. - Euclid

Revolutions never occur in mathematics. - Michael Crowe

Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra? - George Carlin

I graduated first in my class from alibi school. - Jeffrey McDaniel

When no one understands you, chocolate is there. - Daniel Worona

Pure mathematics is the poetry of logical ideas. - Albert Einstein

Pedestrian: a man whose son is home from college. - Unknown

Mathematics knows no races or geographic boundaries. - David Hilbert

Chocolate is more than a food, but less than a drug. - R J Huxtable

Most every dental school has discount dental services. - Matthew Lesko

I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know. - Bill Watterson

If there's no chocolate in Heaven, I'm not going. - Jane Seabrook

A college education shows a man how little other people know. - T.C. Hailburton

School Of Hard Knocks: Where they train door-to-door salesmen - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

"Obvious" is the most dangerous word in mathematics. - Eric T. Bell

Chocolate doesn't ask silly questions. Chocolate understands. - Unknown

Chocolate is medicinal. I just did another study that confirms it. - Michelle M. Pillow

God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board. - Mark Twain

Nine out of ten people like chocolate. The tenth person always lies. - Unknown

Walking has been ridiculous in college basketball the past 15 years. - Bobby Knight

In mathematics, you don't understand things. You just get used to them. - John von Neumann

Chocolate makes otherwise normal people melt into strange states of ecstasy. - John West

I'm not buying my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did. - Yogi Berra

To be safe at the expense of the liberty of other people is a difficult equation. - Madeleine Albright

Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school. - Albert Einstein

In one equation you can solve all the puzzles of life. It is the equation of giving. - Amit Ray

Let us grant that the pursuit of mathematics is a divine madness of the human spirit. - Alfred Whitehead

I can get motivated seeing a kid at my son's school overcome a learning disability. - Jason Alexander

I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson

If I feel unhappy, I do mathematics to become happy. If I am happy, I do mathematics to keep happy. - Alfred Renyi

Reading a good book in silence is like eating chocolate for the rest of your life and never getting fat. - Becca Fitzpatrick

Then she thought bitterly that it would be much easier to resist chocolate if her life were less stressful. - J K Rowling

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

Amazingly when you add life and consciousness to the equation you can actually explain some of the biggest puzzles of science. - Robert Lanza

"Exercise" is such a dirty word in my household that whenever I even think of it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate. - Leonore Fleischer

Integrate what you believe in every single area of your life. Take your heart to work and ask the most and best of everybody else too. - Meryl Streep

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

Mathematics began to seem too much like puzzle solving. Physics is puzzle solving, too, but of puzzles created by nature, not by the mind of man. - Maria G. Mayer

With the steady disintegration of the family in modern society over the last century, the role of the school in bridging the gap has become vital. - Stephen Covey

Pressing Art

Mask Alternatives

Watch Out For Deer!

Chinese Music School

Student Driver

iPad Not

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

It Even Has A Chimney

Seal Survival

www: Wagtail Windscreen Wiper

Water Dancer

Shopping Wait-er

Flamingo Imposter

Goat Tree

Ontario Spring Dining

Empty Birdhouse

180 Degrees From Ordinary

How To Float

Redneck Tank Top

Grasping Shirt

Detroit Counterfeit Bill

Hazardous Delivery

Log Out - Here It Comes!

Search and Rescue - Dry Run