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Ladies Golf

Signs of a men-only golf course

Ladies Golf thanks to Gwen Laxton

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Golf is a good walk spoiled. - H.S. Scrivener

I'm a golfer, not an athlete. - Lee Westwood

Golf is a puzzle without an answer. - Gary Player

You drive for show but putt for dough. - Bobby Locke

I am putting real plums into an imaginary cake. - Mary McCarthy

Putting your hands in the earth is very grounding. - John Glover

Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. - Unknown

Real golfers don't miss putts, they get robbed. - Unknown

Putting Green: Great oaths from little acorns grow. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out. - Paul Gallico

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. - H G Wells

Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown

Are we playing Men's Rules today or do we count every putt? - Unknown

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

Family means putting your arms around each other and being there. - Barbara Bush

Farmers: Men successful only if they sell their farms to golf clubs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You realize just how bad a golfer you are when you play with Freddie. - Donald Trump

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. - Joey Adams

How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. - Dwight D Eisenhower

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. - Gerald R. Ford

In golf as in life, it's the follow-through that makes the difference. - Unknown

He writes so well he makes me feel like putting the quill back in the goose. - Fred Allen

I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill. - George Burns

She learned to say things with her eyes that others waste time putting into words. - Corey Ford

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. - Miles Kington

Golf is the worst drug in the world. You just keep coming back fro more embarrassment. - Deacon Jones

Sometimes the game of golf is just too difficult to endure with a golf club in your hands. - Bobby Jones

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket. - Ambrose Bierce

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

A good lie will have traveled half way around the world while the truth is putting on her boots. - Mark Twain

Of all the useless things a person can do, limerick writing is right up there with golf and fishing. - Garrison Keillor

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The reason your golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so that you can't see him laughing. - Phyllis Diller

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. - Ernest Hemingway

Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. - Arthur Daley

It is often wonderful how putting down on paper a clear statement of a case helps one to see, not perhaps the way out, but the way in. - Arthur Christopher Benson

I don't know him very well... I've played him at golf and beat him badly both times, and I think that probably had a negative impact on him. - Donald Trump


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