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Microsoft Software Upgrade

Not looking forward to the next software upgrade?

Microsoft Software Upgrade thanks to Jack Harris

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Defect-free software does not exist. - Wietse Venema

A hooker once told me she had a headache. - Rodney Dangerfield

Oh, so they have internet on computers now! - Homer Simpson

The internet is a great way to get on the net. - Bob Dole

Immunity to boredom gives the computer an edge. - Alan Lakein

Real Soon Now: When the software will be shipped - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mobile is a lot closer to TV than it is to desktop. - Mark Zuckerberg

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

Ecrastinate: Checking your e-mail just one more time - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail. - Stephen Fry

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

The computer is down. I hope it's something serious. - Stanton Delaplane

The two-headed boy in the circus never had such a headache. - WC Fields

Iconomic: Making do with fewer icons on your computer desktop - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk

The Internet treats censorship as a malfunction and routes around it. - John P Barlow

If it weren't for my adam's apple, I'd have no shape at all. - Phyllis Diller

Being in love with yourself means never having to say you've got a headache. - Ellie Laine

If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe. - Carl Sagan

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

Internet: The best library in the world, but with all its books strewn across the floor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Feature Creep: 1. The bloating of software with too many features; 2. A nasty software developer. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

Just as we could have rode into the sunset, along came the Internet, and it tripled the significance of the PC. - Andy Grove

Man is the cheapest 150-pound nonlinear, all-purpose computer system which can be mass-produced by unskilled labor. - NASA

Word-of-mouth marketing has always been important. Today, it's more important than ever because of the Internet. - Newt Barrett

I don't like creating software anymore. It's too exact. It's like karate; there's no room for error. - John Maeda

Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well. - Martin Luther

In California virtually everyone has had their teeth whitened. If they all smiled at once, they would give us a headache. - Garrison Keillor

Until Facebook came along, there was hardly anywhere on the public Internet where you had to operate with your real name. - David Kirkpatrick

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

Facebook is in a very different place than Apple, Google, Amazon, Samsung, and Microsoft. We are trying to build a community. - Mark Zuckerberg

The day I made that statement, about inventing the internet, I was tired because I'd been up all night inventing the camcorder. - Al Gore

Boat Anchor: 1. Thrown out when you need it, and taken in when you don't; 2. An old computer so useless that it needs to go to sea. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

The majority of people who don't have Internet don't have the Internet because they don't know why they want to use the Internet. - Mark Zuckerberg

For the past 10 years, corporations have been trained that they should use all the different media. But the Internet is becoming the umbrella. - Larry Weber

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose. - Andy Rooney


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