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Microsoft Software Upgrade

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Microsoft Software Upgrade thanks to Jack Harris

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The computer is a moron. - Peter F Drucker

My wife gives good headache. - Rodney Dangerfield

Defect-free software does not exist. - Wietse Venema

Computer viruses should count as life. - Stephen Hawking

A hooker once told me she had a headache. - Rodney Dangerfield

The apple will fall under the apple tree. - Greek Proverb

I took the initiative in creating the internet. - Al Gore

Real Soon Now: When the software will be shipped - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mobile is a lot closer to TV than it is to desktop. - Mark Zuckerberg

Ecrastinate: Checking your e-mail just one more time - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet. - Will Ferrell

The Internet is a telephone system that's gotten uppity. - Clifford Stoll

An apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough. - Unknown

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk

The internet turns 30 minutes of homework into 2 hours of homework. - Unknown

People who are really serious about software should make their own hardware. - Alan Kay

A great wind is blowing, and that gives you either imagination or a headache. - Catherine the Great

Being in love with yourself means never having to say you've got a headache. - Ellie Laine

Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant. - Mitchell Kapor

Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I almost sent you a real birthday card but thankfully my internet connection came back. - Unknown

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

I don't like creating software anymore. It's too exact. It's like karate; there's no room for error. - John Maeda

The new information technology (Internet and e-mail) have practically eliminated the physical costs of communications. - Peter F Drucker

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well. - Martin Luther

From sixdegrees to Friendster to Facebook, social networking has become a familiar and ubiquitous part of the Internet. - David Kirkpatrick

Aftermath: 1. The period following algebra; 2. The horrible headache you have when you've finished the algebra test. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them. - Penn Jillette

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

The day I made that statement, about inventing the internet, I was tired because I'd been up all night inventing the camcorder. - Al Gore

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

Cell phones, mobile e-mail, and all the other cool and slick gadgets can cause massive losses in our creative output and overall productivity. - Robin S Sharma

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose. - Andy Rooney

The problem with the internet is that it gives you everything - reliable material and crazy material. So the problem becomes, how do you discriminate? - Umberto Eco

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah


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