#1 humor site on the 'net

Forever Round

Going round and round in circles

Forever Round thanks to Karen Moore

QuotaBills
Electrocardiograph: Ticker tape - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Bacon is duct tape for the kitchen. - Unknown

I'm in shape. Round is a shape. - George Carlin

Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver. - Unknown

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. - Douglas Adams

Angular momentum makes the world go round. - Unknown

Noise creates illusions. Silence brings truth. - Maxime Lagace

At a round table there is no dispute about place. - Italian Proverb

You can't fix stupid - not even with duct tape. - Unknown

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

Pie are not square. Pie are round. Cornbread are square. - Unknown

What a strange illusion to suppose that beauty is goodness. - Leo Tolstoy

My neighbor has a circular driveway - he can't get out. - Steven Wright

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. - Albert Einstein

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

If we choose, we can live in a world of comforting illusion. - Noam Chomsky

Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim

A lie travels round the world while truth is putting her boots on. - French proverb

Some of my best friends are illusions. Been sustaining me for years. - Sheila Ballantyne

Our separation from each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. - Albert Einstein

Never say never because limits, like fears, are often just an illusion. - Michael Jordan

Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly. - Morticia Addams

God made the world round so we would never be able to see too far down the road. - Unknown

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. - Franklin P. Jones

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. - Scott Adams

One only needs two tools in life: WD-40 to make things go, and duck tape to make them stop. - G.M. Weilacher

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality. - Irish Murdoch

Take, if you must, this little bag of dreams. Unloose the cord, and they will wrap you round. - William Butler Yeats

I'd have thrashed him to within an inch of his life, but I didn't have a tape measure. - Groucho Marx

As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round. - Ben Hogan

Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist but you have ceased to live. - Mark Twain

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

I was training to be an electrician. I suppose I got wired the wrong way round somewhere along the line. - Elvis Presley

Dreams or illusions, call them what you will, they lift us from the commonplace of life to better things. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape. - Mark Twain

Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached. - Simone Weil

Only think of two things - the gun and the tape. When you hear the one, just run like hell until you break the other. - Sam Mussabini

All those good people huddling behind bars in gated communities - it's the wrong way round. The others should have the bars. - Judy Sheindlin


Women's Outhouse

Crocodile Floor

Hummer Carriage

Antler Switch Plate

Redneck Cotter Pin

Redneck Bulldozer

Your Fly Is Down

Chili Rub

Tire Rotation

Political Promise Hauler

Steering Wheel For Couples

Confined By Walls

Moon Descent

Redneck Selfie Stick

1957 Woolworth Menu

Cops Beating A Black Man in NYC

The New Norm

Police Car Of The Year

If You're Looking For A Sign

Upside Down Amusement

Bread Zeppelin

Special Second Meal

Perfect Grill

Heat Expands