#1 humor site on the 'net

Microslave: You're Not Going Anywhere Today

Feel captive to your computer apps?

Microslave: You're Not Going Anywhere Today thanks to Mike King

When you can't seem to get away from your computer

QuotaBills
Be not a slave of words. - Thomas Carlyle

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie. - David Mamet

To educate a man is to unfit him to be a slave. - Frederick Douglass

Immunity to boredom gives the computer an edge. - Alan Lakein

Who dares not speak his free thought is a slave. - Euripides

Computer logic is no substitute for human wisdom. - Unknown

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

The art of being a slave is to rule one's master. - Diogenes

Hunger is felt by a slave and hunger is felt by a king. - Ashanti Proverb

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

I was born a slave, but nature gave me a soul of a free man. - Toussaint Louverture

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. - Robert Orben

We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie. - David Mamet

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

Reality: The leading cause of stress among those in touch with it. - Lily Tomlin

Once a man has tasted freedom, he will never be content to be a slave. - Walt Disney

Your mind is your instrument. Learn to be its master and not its slave. - Unknown

Stress is an important dragon to slay - or at least tame - in your life. - Marilu Henner

Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness. - Richard Carlson

God will never give you anything you can't handle, so don't stress. - Kelly Clarkson

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

Stress depletes willpower, which diminishes your ability to control those emotions. - Roy F Baumeister

The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another. - William James

Stress is your body's way of saying you haven't worked enough unpaid overtime. - Scott Adams

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

Stress exacerbates any problem, whether it's diabetes, heart trouble, MS, or whatever. - Mary Ann Mobley

He who will not reason, is a bigot; he who cannot is a fool; and he who dares not is a slave. - illiam Drummond

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

In times of great stress or adversity, plow your anger and your energy into something positive. - Lee Iacocca

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

There is no king who has not had a slave among his ancestors, and no slave who has not had a king among his. - Helen Keller

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

Transformation also means looking for ways to stop pushing yourself so hard professionally or inviting so much stress. - Gail Sheehy

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

A slave has but one master; an ambitious man has as many masters as there are people who may be useful in bettering his position. - Jean de La Bruyere

Animals are not our selfie props. If there's any risk that your photo is going to hurt or stress an animal, it's not worth it. - Angela Henderson

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe


NAACP Cover Up

Quad Shot

Princess Parking

Restaurant Wait-er

How Much Is That Doggie In The Window?

Butterfly Lens

Pentecost Sunday

Pike Mouth Nest

Improvise, Adapt, Overcome

Flower Lips

Bird Walker

Never Go Full Retard

Multi-Pilot Jet

Teethbrushes

Dinner Preparation: Here's looking at you!

Picture Perfect

Same Mistake Twice

How To Build A Fence

Horse-Back Riding

Social Distancing Fine

Burnout Indication

Lost Luggage

A Balanced Diet

Bowen Arrow