Redneck Palm Pilot

The computer is a moron. - Peter F Drucker

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Computer viruses should count as life. - Stephen Hawking

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

We don't need nukes. We have the internet. - Alice Minium

The internet is a great way to get on the net. - Bob Dole

The righteous will flourish like the palm tree. - Psalms 92:12

Real Soon Now: When the software will be shipped - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

Ecrastinate: Checking your e-mail just one more time - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

People will believe anything they read on the internet. - Abraham Lincoln

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II

The Internet is a telephone system that's gotten uppity. - Clifford Stoll

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

In software systems it is often the early bird that makes the worm. - Alan Perlis

On the keyboard of life always keep one finger on the 'escape' key. - Unknown

Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant. - Mitchell Kapor

I almost sent you a real birthday card but thankfully my internet connection came back. - Unknown

Transplanting the ballet to the United States is like trying to raise a palm tree in Dakota. - Lincoln Kirsten

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

I don't like creating software anymore. It's too exact. It's like karate; there's no room for error. - John Maeda

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

The new information technology (Internet and e-mail) have practically eliminated the physical costs of communications. - Peter F Drucker

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

Until Facebook came along, there was hardly anywhere on the public Internet where you had to operate with your real name. - David Kirkpatrick

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them. - Penn Jillette

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting. - Dave Barry

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Cell phones, mobile e-mail, and all the other cool and slick gadgets can cause massive losses in our creative output and overall productivity. - Robin S Sharma

The problem with the internet is that it gives you everything - reliable material and crazy material. So the problem becomes, how do you discriminate? - Umberto Eco