It's Safe To Come Out Now, Honey

Marriage is the sunset of love. - French Proverb

Knewlyweds: Second marriage for both - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

Second Marriage: The triumph of hope over experience. - Samuel Johnson

The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

Keep thy eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterward. - Thomas Fuller

Real Estate: What your house is called during divorce proceedings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle

Tragedy: a busload of lawyers going over a cliff with an empty seat. - Unknown

Lawsuit: a machine you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad. - Woody Allen

Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. - Irwin Corey

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush

If the people don't want to come out to the ballpark, nobody's going to stop them. - Yogi Berra

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce. - Woody Allen

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

I am one of those cliff-hanging Catholics. I don't believe in God, but I do believe that Mary was his mother. - Martin Sheen

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them. - Ogden Nash

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

For two people in a marriage to live together day after day is unquestionably the only miracle the Vatican has overlooked. - Bill Cosby

The best cookies of all in the world are the ones my daughter Sally makes. They come out all uniform with nice little air holes. - Willard Scott

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. - Robert Anderson