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It's Safe To Come Out Now, Honey

Fix your marriage - take your wife on a LONG vacation

It's Safe To Come Out Now, Honey thanks to Bill Wellbelove

When you know your marriage is on the rocks

QuotaBills
Divorce: fission after fusion. - Rita Mae Brown

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez

People, some good, some bad, but in the long run we come out even. - Jan Hittle

My wife and I are getting remarried. Our divorce didn't work out. - Rodney Dangerfield

Lawsuit: a machine you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad. - Woody Allen

Marriage is too interesting an experiment to be tried only once or twice. - Eva Gabor

If you have a boat and a happy marriage, you don't need another thing. - Ed McMahon

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

In marriage, being the right person is as important as finding the right person. - Wilbert Donald Gough

I hope that one or two immortal lyrics will come out of all this tumbling around. - Louise Bogan

Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. - Irwin Corey

Marriage is the harmony of God synchronizing two wills with the will of the Father. - Ravi Zacharias

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without the emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both. - Ravi Zacharias

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce. - Woody Allen

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

I am one of those cliff-hanging Catholics. I don't believe in God, but I do believe that Mary was his mother. - Martin Sheen

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them. - Ogden Nash

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is. - Milton Berle

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. - Robert Anderson

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx


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