Japanese Yen for Downside Housing

Every man is a king at home. - English Proverb

Oscar night at my house is called Passover. - Bob Hope

A road to a friend's house is never long. - Danish Proverb

There will be no whitewash at the White House. - Richard M Nixon

He'd go through the house like Typhoon Mary. - Archie Bunker

One aged man - one man - can't fill a house. - Robert Frost

Since the house is on fire let us warm ourselves. - Italian Proverb

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

I just heard from Bill Bailey. He's not coming home. - Henny Youngman

Home is not where you live but where they understand you. - Christion Morgenstern

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

An empty purse and a new house make a man wise, but too late. - Portuguese Proverb

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

In my house I'm the boss. My wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen

I suppose I could have stayed home and baked cookies and had teas. - Hillary Clinton

I will clean house when Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner. - Roseanne Barr

What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family. - Mother Teresa

Don't ya know it's bad luck to keep icrons in a Christian home? - Archie Bunker

Hidin' out in the house all the time, like some Bantam of the Opera. - Archie Bunker

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Tell her I ain't crawlin' home to her with my tail between her legs. - Archie Bunker

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs. - Steven Wright

Someone told me I was immature. Guess who's not allowed in my tree house now? - Unknown

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

If more of us cared about food and home above gold, this world would be a merrier place. - Bilbo Baggins

Maybe I'd like to run around the house in my drawers, and with her here, I felt inhabited. - Archie Bunker

In my house on the ceilings I have paintings of the rooms above, so I never have to go upstairs. - Steven Wright

No guest is so welcome in a friend's house that he will not become a nuisance after three days. - Plautus

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going. - Phyllis Diller

A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over, nobody's home." I went over. Nobody was home. - Rodney Dangerfield

A happy home is one in which each spouse grants the possibility that the other may be right, though neither believes it. - Don Fraser

If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers. - Edgar W. Howe

One need not be a chamber to be haunted;
One need not be a house;
The brain has corridors surpassing
Material place. - Emily Dickinson

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him with, "Who could have done this? We have no enemies." - Phyllis Diller

An expert is somebody who is more than fifty miles from home, has no responsibility for implementing the advice he gives, and shows slides. - Edwin Meese

I am a gypsy. I haven't had a home for a long time. Call me a homeless person - I just throw everything in a bag and I'm good to go. - Taylor Kinney

One night I walked home very late and fell asleep in somebody's satellite dish. My dreams were showing up on TV's all over the world. - Steven Wright