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Milk of Amnesia

For those who can't remember CRAP

Milk of Amnesia thanks to Karen Moore

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Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman - Christopher Walken

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid

Pain is temporary; quitting is forever. - Lance Armstrong

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine. - Lord Byron

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. - French Proverb

Restore a man to his health, his purse lies open to thee. - Robert Burton

We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. - Kenji Miyazawa

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid

Suicide doesn't end the pain. It just passes it on to someone else. - James Kirkup

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

Out of suffering comes creativity. You cannot spell painting without pain. - John Lithgow

Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain. - Joseph Campbell

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. - Redd Foxx

Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham

The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley

No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free. - P.J. O'Rourke

Pain is neither intolerable nor everlasting... it is in the power of the soul to maintain its own serenity. - Marcus Aurelius

Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not. - George Bernard Shaw

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

Just like a shoe, if someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly. No forcing, no struggling, and no pain. - Unknown

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - O.S. Marden

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler


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