Newfie Riding Lawn Mower

Mamogram: A telegram to Mom - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mother is a verb, not a noun. - Shonda Rhimes

Grammer: Your father's mother. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Leisure is the Mother of Philosophy. - Thomas Hobbes

As is the mother, so is her daughter. - Bible

Ignorance is the mother of admiration. - George Chapman

A child's first teacher is its mother. - Peng Liyuan

I'm not crazy. My mother had me tested. - Unknown

You trust your mother, but you cut the cards. - Unknown

An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy. - Spanish Proverb

Mother-In-Law Sandwich: Cold shoulder and tongue - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My mom had a very difficult childhood. My childhood. - Cindy Marzahn

The titular head... that's the mother, ain't it? - Archie Bunker

Nothing is really lost until your Mom can't find it. - Unknown

His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork. - Mae West

All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother. - Abraham Lincoln

I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father. - Greg Norman

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

Obedience is the mother of success and is wedded to safety. - Aeschylus

She's descended from a long line her mother listened to. - Gypsy Rose Lee

Life doesn't come with a manual. It comes with a mother. - Unknown

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

A mother is a story with no beginning. That is what defines her. - Meghan O'Rourke

I've never struck a woman in my life, not even my own mother. - WC Fields

I'm so ugly my mother had morning sickness - AFTER I was born. - Rodney Dangerfield

My mother was my role model before I even knew what that word was. - Lisa Leslie

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

To the world you are a mother, but to your family you are the world. - Unknown

A mother is your first friend, your best friend, your forever friend. - Unknown

We laugh, we cry, we make time fly. We are best friends, my mom and I. - Unknown

I don't believe in God because I don't believe in Mother Goose. - Clarence Darrow

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist. - Robin Williams

New mother - they get a sense of waddya call, "the maternals." - Archie Bunker

Now, as always, the most automated appliance in a household is the mother. - Beverly Jones

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it. - Mark Twain

Summer Camps: Those places where little boys go for mother's vacation. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields

There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The influence of a mother in the lives of her children is beyond calculation. - James E Faust

A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. - Dorothy C Fisher

Grandmother, as she gets older, is not fading, but becoming more concentrated. - Paulette Alden

Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible. - Marion C. Garretty

Antifreeze: What happens to your mother's sister when you steal her blanket - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Spoiled Rotten: What the kids become after as little as 15 minutes with Grandma - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother willing to let him have one. - Unknown

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Henry Ward Beecher

Grandmother and grandchild never truly part, maybe in distance but never in heart. - Unknown

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed - I never knew they worked. - Les Dawson

A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. - Irish Proverb

I not only think we tamper with Mother Nature, I think that Mother Nature wants us to. - Willard Gatlin

My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind. - Les Dawson

The only place you’re sure to find love is at the end of a letter from your mother. - Bruce Lansky

A grandmother is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher, and a little bit best friend. - Unknown

My perspective on my mother has changed immensely. She was a lot taller when I was younger. - Howie Mandel

When you are looking at your mother, you are looking at the purest love you will ever know. - Charley Benetto

If you have a mom, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been. - Robert Brault

A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity. - Agatha Christie

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day. - Jay Leno

Youth fades; love droops; the leaves of friendship fall. A mother's secret hope outlives them all. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce. - Woody Allen

There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and his mother's age. - Benjamin Spock

Food: The response Mom usually gives in answer to the question, "What's for dinner tonight?" - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

As a family we couldn't decide whether to have Grandma buried or cremated, so in the end we decided to let her live. - Gary Delaney

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow. - Maya Angelou

I think Mick Jagger would be astounded and amazed if he realized that to many people he is not a sex symbol, but a mother image. - David Bowie

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller

Never play cards with a man called Doc, never eat at a place called Mom's, and never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own. - Nelson Algren