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Redneck Funeral

Who says you can't take it with you?

Redneck Funeral thanks to Martin Grosse

QuotaBills
Into the sky to win or die. - Christopher Paolini

Nobody ever died of laughter. - Max Beerbohm

One has only to die to be praised. - German Proverb

Now, young Skywalker... you will die. - The Emperor

The best way to get praise is to die. - Italian Proverb

My grandmother made dying her life's work. - Hugh Leonard

Death and taxes are unsolved engineering problems. - Romana Machado

Death - the last sleep? No, it is the final awakening. - Walter Scott

There is no cure for death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

I can't afford to die - I'd lose too much money. - George Burns

If you wish to die young, make your physician your heir. - Romania Proverb

You haven't lived until you've died in California. - Mort Sahl

To die in the flower of age is a life offered in sacrifice. - Madagascar Saying

Absolute silence leads to sadness. It is the image of death. - Jean-Jacques Rousseau

A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic. - Joseph Stalin

After your death, you will be what you were before your birth. - Arthur Schopenhauer

What pity is it that we can die but once to serve our country. - Joseph Addison

Live so that the pastor won't have to lie at your funeral. - Phil Callaway

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

He is terribly afraid of dying because he hasn’t yet lived. - Franz Kafka

Praise follows truth afar off, and only overtakes her at the grave. - James R Lowell

Easter says you can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there. - Clarence W Hall

My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying. - Rodney Dangerfield

Can grave and formal pass for wise,
When Men the solemn Owl despise? - Benjamin Franklin

In an artist's life, death is perhaps not the most difficult thing. - Vincent van Gogh

What is called a reason for living is also an excellent reason for dying. - Albert Camus

They can keep their heaven. When I die, I'd sooner go to Middle Earth. - George R.R. Martin

Only faith in Christ gives rise to a culture contrary to egotism and death. - Pope John Paul II

A living person whom death has deprived of the power of filial ingratitude. - Ambrose Bierce

Was Uncle Oscar's death very untimely, you ask? Well, it was near lunch. - Archie Bunker

I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock. - Henny Youngman

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers. - Grace Hansen

"Fearless" is living in spite of those things that scare you to death. - Taylor Swift

You need to bury the hatchet. No need to hold grudges. That only weighs you down. - Ken Shamrock

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it. - P.J. O'Rourke

It's better to die in pursuit of your dreams than to live a life without hope. - Terry Brooks

I think we risk becoming the best-informed society that has ever died of ignorance. - Ruben Blades

Cowards die many times before their deaths; The valiant never taste of death but once. - William Shakespeare

My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One of the other of us has to go. - Oscar Wilde

Death had to take him in his sleep, for if he was awake there'd have been a fight. - Theodore Roosevelt

I'm a Catholic and I can't commit suicide, but I plan to drink myself to death. - Jack Kerouac

Each night, when I go to sleep, I die. And the next morning, when I wake up, I am reborn. - Mahatma Gandhi

The great comfort of turning 49 is the realization that you are now too old to die young. - Paul Dickson

Christ died for our sins. Are we to make his martyrdom meaningless by not committing them? - Jules Feiffer

Anything I've ever done that ultimately was worthwhile... initially scared me to death. - Betty Bender

Death is the last enemy; once we've got past that I think everything will be all right. - Alice Thomas Ellis

If you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made. Very few people die past that age. - George Burns

All men should strive to learn before they die, what they are running from, and to, and why. - James Thurber

Men will wrangle for religion; write for it; fight for it; die for it; anything but live for it. - Charles Caleb Colton

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

Life is better than death, if only because it is less boring, and because it has fresh peaches in it. - Alice Walker

You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live. Now. - Joan Baez

Madame, all stories, if continued far enough, end in death, and he is no true-story teller who would keep that from you. - Ernest Hemingway

When God decides who should live or die, he is immoral. When you decide who should live or die, it's your moral right. - Ravi Zacharias

Success is like death. The more successful you become, the higher the houses in the hills get and the higher the fences get. - Kevin Spacey

If you carefully consider what you want to be said of you in the funeral experience, you will find your definition of success. - Stephen Covey

If you think that praise is due, now's the time to show it, 'cause a man can't read his tombstone when he's dead. - Unknown

If you removed all the arteries, veins, and capillaries from a person's body, and tied them end-to-end... the person will die. - Neil deGrasse Tyson

We are all the fools of time and terror: Days Steal on us and steal from us; yet we live, Loathing our life, and dreading still to die. - George Gordon Byron

When you die, God and the angels will hold you accountable for all the pleasures you were allowed in this life that you denied yourself. - Unknown

When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life in such a manner that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice. - Unknown

Clay. It's rain, dead leaves, dust, all my dead ancestors. Stones that have been ground into sand. Mud. The whole cycle of life and death. - Martine Vermeulen

What kind of man would live a life without daring? Is life so sweet that we should criticize men that seek adventure? Is there a better way to die? - Charles Lindbergh

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


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