Soft Landing - Kowabunga, Dude!

Old men are twice children. - Greek Proverb

It's never too late for a happy childhood. - Gloria Steinem

A new toy is something a child uses to break his old toys. - Joe-kster

The great man is one who never loses his child’s heart. - Mencius

Little children, little sorrows; big children, great sorrows. - Danish Proverb

Inspiration usually comes during work, rather than before it. - Madeleine L'Engle

Children are one third of our population and all of our future. - Unknown

Mick Jagger could French-kiss a moose. He has child-bearing lips. - Joan Rivers

The deepest definition of youth is life as yet untouched by tragedy. - Alfred Whitehead

For one change always leaves a dovetail into which another will fit. - Niccolo Machiavelli

My children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced on television. - Erma Bombeck

Don't focus on regrets; find your inspiration in what you can do now. - Catherine Pulsifer

As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula. - Dave Barry

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the life of the party. - Groucho Marx

I'm not buying my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did. - Yogi Berra

What can we make of the inexpressible joy of children? It is a kind of gratitude. - Annie Dillard

I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate. - Nancy Astor

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you're going to write a book on how to raise children, do it before you have them. - Bob McLaren

It's not that age brings childhood back again. Age merely shows what children we remain. - Goethe

It's easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult. Choose your words wisely. - Unknown

No more massive injections. Tiny children are not horses - one vaccine at a time, over time. - Donald Trump

Every time a child is born it brings with it the hope that God is not yet disappointed in man. - Rabindranath Tagore

While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about. - Angela Schwindt

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own. - Aristotle

Mid-life crisis is that moment when you realize your children and your clothes are about the same age. - William D Tammeus

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

All kids are trouble, Edith. And I don't wanna spend my reclining years trying to raise another one. - Archie Bunker

If a child, a spouse, a life partner, or a parent depends on you and your income, you need life insurance. - Suze Orman

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to. - Bill Vaughan

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires. - Dorothy Parker

Play is a vital learning medium for a child. In a sense play is his work. And he discovers knowledge for himself. - Raymond Moore

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. - Bill Vaughan

We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves. - Buddha

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

The more difficulties one has to encounter, within and without, the more significant and the higher in inspiration his life will be. - Horace Bushnell

Education commences on the mother's knee, and every word spoken within hearsay of little children tends toward the formation of character. - Hosea Ballou