QuotaBillsBeer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee
I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King
Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw
Good wine is a necessity of life. - Thomas Jefferson
Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash
Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder. - Addison Mizner
Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen
When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller
Good friends, like wine, get better with age. - Unknown
Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
Draft Dodger: Someone who avoids beer on tap. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Beer: The method of turning grain into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway
I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart
Bladder: The human apparatus that pays the tax on beer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The fountain of youth is a mixture of gin and vermouth. - Cole Porter
Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields
If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu
Some call it Cocktail Hour. To me, it's a support group. - Unknown
Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II
I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw
I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown
Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II
In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown
A raise is like a martini: it elevates the spirit, but only temporarily. - Dan Seligman
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine. - Casablanca
Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany
Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks. - George Burns
Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King
I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often - but I'm well preserved. - Rose Kennedy
When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument. - C.S. Forester
Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson
If you have to choose between drinking wine every day or being skinny, which would you choose: Red or White? - Unknown
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine
I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen
It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron
In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns
When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor