QuotaBillsPhysician, heal thyself. - Luke 4:23
Diabetes taught me discipline. - Sonia Sotomayor
No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb
Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Good doctors make poor patients. - Unknown
Dentist Office: A filling station - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Diabetes is a lousy, lousy disease. - Elaine Stritch
A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb
No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez
Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer
God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin
Time is a physician that heals every grief. - Diphilus
Life is pharmaceutical from head to cuticle. - David McCord
Fashion saves a lot more lives than doctors. - Bruno Gehard
Better a lucky physician than a learned one. - English Proverb
Space ails us moderns: we are sick with space. - Robert Frost
Sickness comes on horseback but departs on foot. - Dutch Proverb
I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying - dead. - Oscar Wilde
Why do the best doctors have the sickest patients? - Unknown
My music isn't just music - it's medicine. - Unknown
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher
Though physician to others, yet himself full of sores. - Latin Proverb
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx
After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
Jockey: What a dentist uses when you won't open your mouth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler
I'll never forget my wedding day... they threw vitamin pills. - Groucho Marx
A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier
Where there is laughter there is always more health than sickness. - Phyllis Bottome
Medicine is only for those who cannot imagine doing anything else. - Luanda Grazette
She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. - Groucho Marx
There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel
Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
There's no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. - Ben Williams
I wanted to be a brain surgeon, but I had a bad habit of dropping things. - Gilbert Gottfried
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb
We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller
The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel
A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker
Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham
To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin
A psychiatrist is a man who goes to Les Folies Bergere and looks at the audience. - Mervyn Stockwood
Diabetes is all about insulin levels and sugar levels and what you put in your body. - Jay Cutler
What clinical lectures I will give in heaven, demonstrating the ignorance of doctors! - Israel Zangwill
The grinding of the intellect is for most people as painful as a dentist's drill. - Leonard Woolf
Life is not over because you have diabetes. Make the most of what you have, be grateful. - Dale Evans
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
We go by the major vote, and if the majority are insane, the sane must go to the hospital. - Horace Mann
Let your entrance into the sick room decrease, not increase, the irritability of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer
Psychiatrist: a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free. - Unknown
Medicine, the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. - James Bryce
I live at the dentist's. I'm on my third set of teeth that they put in with nails and screws. - Charles N. Reilly
Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou
The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain
The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull
Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons
Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon. - Eric Ericksen
In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer
Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet. - Rodney Dangerfield
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis
I was diagnosed with diabetes at age 18. I didn't know what it was, so I went to the library and looked it up. - Ron Santo
My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields
'Tis not always in a physician's power to cure the sick; at times the disease is stronger than trained art. - Ovid
The public needs to know - they need to know as much about atrial fibrillation as they do about cancer and diabetes. - Barry Manilow
I chalk up the fact that I got diabetes to my body saying, 'Dude, you have been doing wrong for way too long!' - Randy Jackson
The only weapon with which the unconscious patient can immediately retaliate upon the incompetent surgeon is hemorrhage. - William Stewart Halsted
The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler
My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer
To the person with a toothache, even if the world is tottering, there is nothing more important than a visit to a dentist. - George Bernard Shaw
'Psychotherapy' is a private, confidential conversation that has nothing to do with illness, medicine, or healing. - Thomas Szasz
I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind. - Paracelsus
A physician is obligated to consider more than a diseased organ, more even than the whole man - he must view the man in his world. - Harvey Cushing
It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker
Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles
When enough people care about autism or diabetes or global warming, it helps everyone, even if only a tiny fraction actively participate. - Seth Godin
I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed. - James Thurber
When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield
My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield
There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman
I'm going to make people happy. I'm going to make them forget about their cancer. I'm going to make them forget about their diabetes. - Dick Dale
A physician's physiology has much the same relation to his power of healing as a cleric's divinity has to his power of influencing conduct. - Samuel Butler
When you are called to a sick man, be sure you know what the matter is — if you do not know, nature can do a great deal better than you can guess. - Nicholas de Belleville
One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler