#1 humor site on the 'net

Salmon Street

City Salmon are preferred over Wild Salmon in Portland, Oregon

Salmon Street thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Fishing Show: Reel-life TV. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

All men are equal before fish. - Herbert Hoover

There's always a bigger fish. - Qui-Gon Jinn

Paraffins: Found on sides of fish - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Castanet: Primitive fishing method - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Only dead fish swim with the stream. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Bassinet: What every fisherman wants. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There are plenty more fish in the sea. - English Proverb

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. - Irina Dunn

Yard: Unit of measurement. In angling, 17 inches. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Love is the net where hearts are caught like fish. - Muhammad Ali

We've got a name for sushi in Georgia... bait. - Blake Clark

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I have laid aside business, and gone a'fishing. - Izaak Walton

One can think of life after the fish is in the canoe. - Hawaii Proverb

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

Be patient and calm; no one can catch a fish with anger. - Herbert Hoover

At high tide, fish eat ants; at low tide, ants eat fish. - Thai Saying

Don't bargain for fish which are still in the water. - India Proverb

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain. - Mark Twain

A sushi chef has to spot the best-quality fresh fish instantly. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Habitat: Place where a particular species of fish was last week - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

For every man there exists a bait which he cannot resist swallowing. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

If you were to make little fishes talk, they would talk like whales. - Oliver Goldsmith

Mermaid: 1. A deep she fish; 2. A bottomless girl in a topless suit. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ideal Summer Resort: A place where fish bite and mosquitoes don't - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A lawyer is an odd sort of fish, first rotten, then green, then ripe. - Robert Christy

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overdo it. - Lao Tzu

A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other. - Samuel Johnson

Fish die belly upward, and rise to the surface. Its their way of falling. - Andre Gide

Good fishing is just a matter of timing. You have to get there yesterday. - Milton Berle

Clement Attlee reminds me of a dead fish before it has had time to stiffen. - George Orwell

Any man who puts his intelligence up against a fish and loses had it coming. - John Steinbeck

What you need is somebody new - there's more than 1 fish in the woodpile. - Archie Bunker

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook beneath it. - Thomas Jefferson

Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

Let your hook be always cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be fish. - Ovid

Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

I was in a sushi bar and it dawned on me - how could I discriminate between a cow and a fish? - Carre Otis

The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

Science is angling in the mud - angling for immortality and for anything else that may turn up. - Aldous Huxley

The opposite for courage is not cowardice, it is conformity. Even a dead fish can go with the flow. - Jim Hightower

Of all the useless things a person can do, limerick writing is right up there with golf and fishing. - Garrison Keillor

When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers. - Imelda Marcos

Model Wife: One who, when she spades the garden, picks up the fish worms and saves them for her husband - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles. - Doug Larson

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Luck affects everything; let your hook always be cast. In the stream where you least expect it, there will be fish. - Ovid

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Fish who are caught and released are like the aquatic equivalent of people who claim to have been abducted by aliens. - Bill Murray

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

Fishing Trip: Journey undertaken by one or more anglers to a place where no one can remember when it has rained so much - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is only one thing harder than looking for a dewdrop in the dew, and that is fishing for a clam in the clam chowder. - New England Proverb

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Unless he doesn't like sushi, then you also have to teach him to cook. - Auren Hoffman

Unsporting: Any fishing technique that has as its chief object the capture of fish rather than the accumulation of fishing equipment - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Somebody just back of you while you are fishing is as bad as someone looking over your shoulder while you write a letter to your girl. - Ernest Hemingway

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein

Memory is a net: one finds it full of fish when he takes it from the brook, but a dozen miles of water have run through it without sticking. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

Fishing Journal: An imaginative work of sub-literature in which the angler records the weight, length, and species of fish he didn't catch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Tall Guy Bike

Lord Voldemort Rock

Illusionary

Copperhead Tree

Dream Big

Spot the Man's Head Hidden in the Coffee Beans

British Survey

Political Promise Transporter

Jam Packed Suitcase

All White Meat

Alien Moon Landing

Nothing But Net

Bible Bar

Branding Inspiration for Graphic Designers

Original Homeland Security - 2nd Amendment

Sunday Weather Forecast

On The Eighth Day

Moses Parting the Ice Field

Texas Limo

No Smoking Fish

New Brunswick Swimming Pools

Box Car

Night Shift for a Computer Geek

Meep Meep