QuotaBillsMarry money. - Max Shulman
Grace: nutrient in the marriage garden - Phil Callaway
In married life three is company and two is none. - Oscar Wilde
Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. - Gloria Steinem
Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb
Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has not pleasure. - Samuel Johnson
The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde
I want a girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad. - Oedipus Rex
Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb
In Hollywood, brides keep the bouquets and throw away the groom. - Groucho Marx
I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez
Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp
Tenderness is greater proof of love than the most passionate of vows. - Marlene Dietrich
I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you. - Paulo Coelho
A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short. - Andre Maurois
I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. - Red Skelton
I believe in love and marriage, but not necessarily with the same person. - John Travolta
Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. - F.M. Knowles
Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton
I've been married so long I'm on my third bottle of Tabasco sauce. - Susan Vass
Will you marry me? Do you have any money?
Answer the second question first. - Groucho Marx
A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers. - Grace Hansen
Help me, I can’t breathe, your ego is pushing all the air out of the room. - Ilona Andrews
Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown
We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush
A good marriage was one in which each person thought he or she was getting the better deal. - Anne Lamott
First of all you’ve got to have talent. And then you've got to marry her like I did. - George Burns
Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without the emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both. - Ravi Zacharias
I married your mother because I wanted children.
Imagine my disappointment when you came along. - Groucho Marx
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx
It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer
When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry
I married for love. But the obvious side benefit of having someone around to find my glasses cannot be ignored. - Cameron Esposito
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them. - Ogden Nash
When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. - Steven Wright
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry
If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor
Getting married is easy. Staying married is more difficult. Staying happily married for a lifetime should rank among the fine arts. - Roberta Flack
Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward
If you never want to see a man again, just tell him, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have children." They leave skid marks. - Rita Rudner