Here Comes Baby

Birth patrol pills. - Archie Bunker

Burn rubber, not your soul, baby. - Craig Fernandez

I've made a career off of Halloween. - Cassandra Peterson

Ever notice how baby shampoo smells like spring? - Toni Sorenson

Halloween pumpkins aglow.
Come see the show. - Unknown

It's easier to dismiss ghosts in the daylight. - Patricia Briggs

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last. - Charles Dickens

Only the knife knows what goes on in the heart of a pumpkin. - Simone Schwarz-Bart

The pumpkin is always oranger on the other side of the patch. - Unknown

After your death, you will be what you were before your birth. - Arthur Schopenhauer

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

Studio 54 made Halloween in Hollywood look like a PTA meeting. - Lorna Luft

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

A house with old furniture has no need of ghosts to be haunted. - Hope Mirrlees

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

I love the spirit of Halloween and the energy that comes with it. - Katharine McPhee

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant. - Richard J. Ferris

A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween. - Erma Bombeck

The big lesson in life, baby, is never be scared of anyone or anything. - Frank Sinatra

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. - H L Mencken

I love you more than pumpkin spice latte but please don't make me prove it! - Unknown

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

The people you love become ghosts inside of you, and like this you keep them alive. - Rob Montgomery

An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. - Queen Victoria

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

The ghosts of things that never happened are worse than the ghosts of things that did. - L.M. Montgomery

I actually have a stash of wigs for Halloween. But only for that. Not to play dress-up. - Alexa Vega

I get more distracted by hair or a really bad wig than I do costumes any day of the week. - Colleen Atwood

I'd rather sit alone on a pumpkin and have it all to myself than be crowded on a velvet cushion. - Henry David Thoreau

When witches go riding and black cats are seen,
The moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween. - Unknown

We used to go around tipping outhouses over, or turning over corn shocks on Halloween. Anything to be mean. - Loretta Lynn

I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what they think of me?' - Drew Carey

If human beings had genuine courage, they'd wear their costumes every day of the year, not just on Halloween. - Douglas Coupland

It is good for a man to invite his ghosts into his warm interior, out of the wild night, into the firelight, out of the howling dark. - A.S. Byatt

Instead of doing cinnamon, nutmeg, and all those baking spices I'll have one spice that's for sweets, and that's pumpkin pie spice. - Sandra Lee

The light of a new day always chases the shadows of the night away, and shows us that the shape of our fears is only the ghost of our own minds. - Terry Goodkind

This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him. - Conan O'Brien