#1 humor site on the 'net

Hurricane Katrina Relief

Senator Kennedy offers aquatic relief to New Orleans residents

Shocked by the widespread suffering of those displaced from their homes by the flooding in New Orleans following Hurricane Katrina, Senator Edward Kennedy (D-Mass.) offered to plug one of the holes in the Lake Pontchartrain levee with his own ample body.
Hurricane Katrina Relief thanks to Shawn Kennedy

"The Bush Administration has failed to stem the tide of this cataclysm," said Kennedy. "I have had some experience with aquatic mishaps. This experience will bolster me in this hour of desperation as I plug one of the leaks myself..."

QuotaBills
Relief: What trees do in the spring - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

For fast-acting relief, try slowing down. - Lily Tomlin

Care shouldn't start in the emergency room. - James Douglas

Death will be a great relief. No more interviews. - Katharine Hepburn

Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman

Trusting our intuition often saves us from disaster. - Anne W Schaef

Meet success like a gentleman and disaster like a man. - Lord Birkenhead

Laughter is the tonic, the relief, the surcease for pain. - Charlie Chaplin

Talent is a loan from God for the relief of man's estate. - Jelal Ad-Din

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth. - Charles Dickens

Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer. - Mark Twain

The only ultimate disaster that can befall us is to feel ourselves at home on this earth. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Any disaster you can survive is an improvement in your character, your stature, and your life. - Joseph Campbell

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

I think it's an absolute disaster that Australia, the government, allowed kangaroo culling. - Steve Irwin

One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow

My husband is so good at home repairs that they have a special VIP area for him in the emergency room. - Unknown

Faith is a fine invention
When Gentlemen can see -
But Microscopes are prudent
In an Emergency. - Emily Dickinson

I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting. - Ronald Reagan

To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow. - Maya Angelou

Optimist: someone who figures that taking a step backward after taking a step forward is not a disaster; it's more like a cha-cha. - Robert Brault

I'm one of those people who's not really turned on by baseball. My idea of a relief pitcher is one that's filled with martinis. - Dean Martin

The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin


Why You Shouldn't Let Your Dog Drink Beer

Reflection

Plane Tennis

New IRS Form

Wisconsin Cheese

MAGA King

Baby Formula

When Gas Costs Too Much

Shoemobile

Salmon Street

Pandemic Treaty

People Of The River

SUV Sinkhole

Hope

Blonde's 710 Cover

Dragon Playground

Redneck Boat Ramp

Jack-A-Lope vs Jack-E-Lope

Urleen

Carry On or Carrion?

Selfie Pilot

Monarch Butterflies - Starting a Monarchy

Air Couch

Europe Road Trip