QuotaBillsQuack: A duck's Doctor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Medicine is the best medicine. - Doctors Anonymous
Good doctors make poor patients. - Unknown
Drill Sergeant: An army dentist. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb
Insomnia is my greatest inspiration. - Jon Stewart
No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez
Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer
Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet
Fashion saves a lot more lives than doctors. - Bruno Gehard
Better a lucky physician than a learned one. - English Proverb
Ever notice how baby shampoo smells like spring? - Toni Sorenson
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb
Why do the best doctors have the sickest patients? - Unknown
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
Every survival kit should include a sense of humor. - Unknown
Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito
Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher
There is no physician who can cure the disease of love. - African Proverb
Why is it we never get our bad medicine in small doses? - Edmund H North
If you wish to die young, make your physician your heir. - Romania Proverb
If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid
When inspiration does not come to me, I go halfway to meet it. - Sigmund Freud
Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler
Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined. - Samuel Goldwyn
No one was ever great without some portion of divine inspiration. - Cicero
Cavity: Empty space ready to be stuffed with dentist's bills. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type. - Phyllis Diller
Baby Boomer: A kid who just polished off six jars of raspberry jam - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett
It is not clear that intelligence has any long-term survival value. - Stephen Hawking
Operation: A surgical job taking minutes to do and years to describe - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club. - Jack London
The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard
Clients don't care about the labor pains; they want to see the baby. - Tim Williams
Inspiration at its best means breath, and only too frequently means wind. - G K Chesterton
Baby: a loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. - Ronald Knox
The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel
I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield
A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker
The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby. - Natalie Wood
To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
It is said to be the manner of hypochondriacs to change often their physician. - William Cullen
A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh
The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown
Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield
Enthusiasm is excitement with inspiration, motivation, and a pinch of creativity. - Bo Bennett
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin
I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence
Amateurs sit and wait for inspiration; the rest of us just get up and go to work. - Stephen King
The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire
An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. - Queen Victoria
Grave: A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin
The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer
Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle
A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright
The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying
Success is 1 percent inspiration, 99 percent perspiration, and 2 percent attention to detail. - Phil
A physician buries his mistakes, a dentist pulls them out, but a teacher has to live with them. - Unknown
My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles
I think of inspiration as desire infused with spirit and topped with an almost reckless optimism. - Fred White
A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows. - Doug Larson
I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller
My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. - Walter Matthau
I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend. - Rodney Dangerfield
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. - Johnny Carson
The men who have furnished me with my greatest inspiration have not been men of wealth, but men of deeds. - James C Penney
The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein
I never used to like babies. I'd always thought if a baby were more like a chimpanzee, I'd have one. - Candice Bergen
If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov
You go to a psychiatrist when you're slightly cracked and keep going until you're completely cracked. - Unknown
Inspiration comes unawares, from unaccountable sources that have nothing to do with planning or intelligence. - Maurice Chevalier
Inspiration comes from within yourself. One has to be positive. When you're positive, good things happen. - Deep Roy
Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet. - Rodney Dangerfield
My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
Medicine is the restoration of discordant elements; sickness is the discord of the elements infused into the living body. - Leonardo da Vinci
Without inspiration the best powers of the mind remain dormant. There is a fuel in us which needs to be ignited with sparks. - Johann Gottfried Von Herder
I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins
The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind. - Paracelsus
A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer
It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin
Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too. - Anton Chekhov
Don't give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don't think you can go wrong. - Ella Fitzgerald
The more difficulties one has to encounter, within and without, the more significant and the higher in inspiration his life will be. - Horace Bushnell
When nature is my inspiration and subject, I am witness to an extraordinary range of color and every imaginable atmospheric condition. - Karen Casey
Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival. - C S Lewis
The physician should look upon the patient as a besieged city and try to rescue him with every means that art and science place at his command. - Alexander of Tralles
One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler
I am keeping with tradition today. After I learned of my Golden Globe nomination, I went to the dentist, so today, let's make it the orthodontist. - Frankie Muniz