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New Element in the Periodic Table

Hazardous Materials Data Sheet now available for 'Woman' element

New Element in the Periodic Table thanks to Kirk Lowry

Boils at room temperature and Freezes without any known reason

Element : WOMEN
Symbol : WO+
Atomic mass : Accepted as 53.6 Kg; isotopes may vary from 40-200 kg.
Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urban areas.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES
1. Boils at room temperature
2. Freezes without any known reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter, if incorrectly used.
5. Sweet as Honey if given a proper treatment.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES
1. Has great affinity for Gold, Silver and a range of precious stones.
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.
4. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

COMMON USES
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
2. Can be great aid to relaxation.

TESTS
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy.
2. Turns green when placed behind a better specimen.

POTENTIAL HAZARD
Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come in direct contact
with each other.

!! WARNING !!
PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS ELEMENT CAN CAUSE SEVERE FINANCIAL HEMORRHAGING AND MENTAL DISTRESS. BE CAUTIOUS - ABOVE PROPERTIES ARE SHOWN BY ALL THE WOMEN OF THE WORLD.
 
QuotaBills
Well-behaved women seldom make history. - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

I'm a woman who wants her chocolate. - Jessica Simpson

Man has his will, but woman has her way. - Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr

Tis brief, my lord... as woman's love. - William Shakespeare

I have a great relationship with Roger Ailes. - Donald Trump

Assumptions are the termites of relationships. - Henry Winkler

Ideal Wife: Any woman who has an ideal husband - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Waitress: A woman who thinks money grows on trays - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Women speak two languages, one of which is verbal. - Steve Rubenstein

Once made equal to man, woman becomes his superior. - Socrates

Certain women should be struck regularly, like gongs. - Noel Coward

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. - George Carlin

Women like silent men. They think they're listening. - Marcel Achard

All women are crazy, it's only a question of degree. - WC Fields

We're women. We have a double standard to live up to. - Ally McBeal

My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flushes. - Robin Williams

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women. - WC Fields

Market: 1. Three women and a goose; 2. What teachers do to homework. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I love men, not because they are men, but because they are not women. - Queen Christina of Sweden

Every woman dreams of her own political career and her own place in life. - Raisa M. Gorbachev

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

Women give us solace, but if it were not for women we would never need solace. - Don Herold

My vigour, vitality, and cheek repel me. I am the kind of woman I would run from. - Nancy Astor

The most beautiful makeup for a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy. - Yves St. Laurent

Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible. - Margaret Mead

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

Many a woman has a past, but I am told that she has at least a dozen, and that they all fit. - Oscar Wilde

Our technological powers increase, but the side effects and potential hazards also escalate. - Alvin Toffler

By the time a woman realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong. - Unknown

There are only three ages for women in Hollywood: Babe, District Attorney, and Driving Miss Daisy. - Goldie Hawn

I have a great relationship with the blacks. I've always had a great relationship with the blacks. - Donald Trump

Deprived of meaningful work, men and women lose their reason for existence; they go stark, raving mad. - Fyodor Dostoevsky

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

A woman, especially if she has the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can. - Jane Austen

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed. - Godfrey Winn

They say women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men. - Clare Boothe Luce

Remember, we're fighting for this woman’s honor, which is probably far more than she's ever done! - Groucho Marx

Part of the reason that men seem so much less loving than women is that men's behavior is measured with a feminine ruler. - Francesca M. Cancian

There's something about a woman with a loud mind that sits in silence, smiling, knowing she can crush you with the truth. - R G Moon

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker


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