'No Fart Forest' for Extreme Fire Hazards

Content is fire and social media is gasoline. - Jay Baer

Love is friendship set on fire. Hate is friendship burned. - Jeremy Taylor

People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes. - Abigail Van Buren

The Irish seem to have more fire about them than the Scots. - Sean Connery

By the time I have money to burn, my fire will have burnt out. - Unknown

Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds. - Buddha

The mind is not a vessel to be filled, but a fire to be kindled. - Plutarch

The clearest way into the universe is through a forest wilderness. - John Muir

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

She's mad but she's magic. There's no lie in her fire. - Charles Bukowski

Managers light a fire under people; leaders light a fire in people. - Kathy Austin

If you tell a joe-k in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joe-k? - Steven Wright

If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears, does it make a sound? - Unknown

Husbands are like fires - they go out when they're left unattended. - Cher

Be enthusiastic as a leader. You can't light a fire with a wet match. - Unknown

Contentment consisteth not in adding more fuel, but in taking away some fire. - Thomas Fuller

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words. - William Shakespeare

Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant. - Mitchell Kapor

Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire. - Arnold H Glasow

I took a physical for some life insurance. All they would give me was fire and theft. - Milton Berle

I always sleep with one shoe in my hand to put out any fires I may accidentally ignite. - Gene Fowler

A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald, but if he has fire, women will like him. - Mae West

The stars are like the trees in the forest, alive and breathing. And they're watching me. - Haruki Murakami

I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. - Monty Python Anb The Holy Grail

You're an old-timer if you can remember when setting the world on fire was a figure of speech. - Franklin P Jones

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? - Unknown

I don't have an alarm clock. If someone needs to wake me up, then I have my BlackBerry next to me. - Mark Zuckerberg

You get the best effort from others not by lighting a fire beneath them, but by building a fire within. - Bob Nelson

In France we leave unmolested those who set fire to the house, and persecute those who sound the alarm. - Sebastien Chamfort

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

Absence destroys small passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes tapers and kindles fires. - Unknown

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

There was a fire at the main Inland Revenue office in London today, but it was put out before any serious good was done. - Ronnie Corbett

I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. - Hartman Jule

Motivation is a fire from within. If someone else tries to light that fire under you, chances are it will burn very briefly. - Stephen R. Covey

I have a microwave fireplace in my house... The other night I laid down in front of the fire for the evening in two minutes. - Steven Wright

There comes a stage at which a man would rather die cleanly by a bullet than by the unknown terror of the phantom in the forest. - Tahir Shah

You don't have to say everything to be a light. Sometimes a fire built on a hill will bring interested people to your campfire. - Shannon L. Alder

A good fart joke makes me bawl with laughter, so will somebody farting. And the word 'poo.' You can't beat a good poo joke. - Jenny Eclair