Texas Divorce

Agree, for the law is costly. - William Camden

Judge me when you are perfect. - Unknown

Common sense often makes good law. - William O Douglas

I don't want tea, I want justice! - Ally Carter

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. - Steven Wright

Lawyers are guardians of the legal order. - Philip Wood

A flagrant violation of international law. - Unknown

In law, nothing is certain but the expense. - Samuel Butler

If you want peace, you must work for justice. - Pope Paul VI

I'm trusting in the Lord and a good lawyer. - Oliver North

Law of the Supermarket: The other line moves faster. - Unknown

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

I've never been in love. I've always been a lawyer. - Unknown

The innkeeper loves the drunkard, but not for a son-in-law. - Yiddish Proverb

What a cage is to the wild beast, law is to the selfish man. - Herbert Spencer

Injustice is relatively easy to bear; what stings is justice. - H L Mencken

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

Don't judge me by my past. I don't live there anymore. - Unknown

Adam was the luckiest man in the world - he had no mother-in-law. - Sholom Aleichem

Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made. - Otto von Bismarck

So I will say it with relish. Give me a hamburger but hold the lawsuit. - S.I. Hayakawa

You cannot live without lawyers, and certainly you cannot die without them. - Joseph H Choate

I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. - Henny Youngman

The Second Law of Pies: they must be baked, not fried (or boiled, or steamed). - Janet Clarkson

I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge? - Douglas Adams

Time is money, especially when you're talking to a lawyer or an accountant. - Joe-kster

Grammar, which knows how to lord it over kings, and with high hands makes them obey its laws. - Moliere

A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity. - Agatha Christie

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I used the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. - Fred Allen

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense. - Edsgar Dijkstra

We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Do not mind anything that anyone tells you about anyone else. Judge everyone and everything for yourself. - Henry James

The legal system is often a mystery, and we, its priests, preside over rituals baffling to everyday citizens. - Henry G. Miller

Whenever men take the law into their own hands, the loser is the law. And when the law loses, freedom languishes. - Robert Kennedy

There are not enough jails, not enough policemen, not enough courts to enforce a law not supported by the people. - Hubert H Humphrey

People judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold, but so has a hard-boiled egg. - Unknown

Now we got a lawyer, we got civilization, which I understand to mean that a man has a chance to get rich without working. - Sinclair Lewis

The main business of a lawyer is to take the romance, the mystery, the irony, the ambiguity out of everything he touches. - Antonin Scalia

If you want to kill an idea without being identified as the assassin, suggest that the legal department take a look at it. - Scott Adams

One does not, by knowing all the physical laws as we know them today, immediately obtain an understanding of anything much. - Richard P Feynman

When the monetary damages are smaller, lawyers will find themselves less zealous in their pursuit of what they call justice. - Dean O'Hare

If we judge ourselves only by our aspirations and everyone else only their conduct we shall soon reach a very false conclusion. - Calvin Coolidge

Written laws are like spider's webs; they will catch the weak and poor, but would be torn in pieces by the rich and powerful. - Anacharsis

Anyone who takes it on himself, on his own authority, to break a bad law, thereby authorizes everyone else to break the good ones. - Denis Diderot

Justice, sir, is the great interest of man on earth. It is the ligament which holds civilized beings and civilized nations together. - Daniel Webster

Laws are like spiders' webs which, if anything small falls into them they ensnare it, but large things break through and escape. - Solon

A judge who likes every outcome he reaches is very likely a bad judge, stretching for results he prefers rather than those the law demands. - Neil Gorsuch

Morality cannot be legislated, but behavior can be regulated. Judicial decrees may not change the heart, but they can restrain the heartless. - Martin Luther King Jr.

What we lawyers want to do is to substitute courts for carnage, dockets for rockets, briefs for bombs, warrants for warheads, mandates for missiles. - George Rhyne

Lawyers are like unrequited lovers: you give them an inch, and they go for the whole nine yards; you take off one shoe, and they pull down your pants. - Andres Rueda