Texas Limo

Texas is as odd as it is vast. - Henry Rollins

Olfactory: Texas petroleum refinery - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The people of Texas want us to secede! - William Clements

Few girls are as well shaped as a good horse. - Christopher Morley

Parts of Texas look like Kansas with a goiter. - Unknown

The old horse in the stable still yearns to run. - Mongolian Proverb

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly. - Unknown

Four wheels move the body. Two wheels move the soul. - Unknown

Texas is a hotbed of insanely good bands and musicians. - Henry Rollins

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq. - Fran Lebowitz

Life is like a horse - either you ride it or it rides you. - Unknown

One more stage, one more limo, one more run for your life. - John Lennon

In plain Texas talk, it's 'do the right thing'. - Ross Perot

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong. - Unknown

I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him float. - Unknown

Don't worry about the horse being blind, just load the wagon. - John Madden

What do you call a cyclist who doesn't wear a helmet? An organ donor. - David Perry

We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. - Red Skelton

Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. - WC Fields

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse. - Adlai Stevenson

In fifty years, he never worked a day. To him, nine to five was odds on a horse. - Archie Bunker

How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design? - Kinky Friedman

Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with. - Jensen Ackles

You've got to concentrate on one idea. You can't ride a horse with two asses. - Joe Segal

A horse gallops with his lungs, perseveres with his heart, and wins with his character. - Tesio

And God took a handful of southerly wind, blew His breath over it and created the horse. - Bedouin Legend

One of the worst things that can happen in life is to win a bet on a horse at an early age. - Danny McGoorty

I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse. - Woody Allen

Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. - Jimmy Fallon

Texas could exist without the United States but the United States cannot exist without Texas. - Sam Houston

The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas. - Malcolm McDowell

Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented. - Molly Ivins

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

Like the old adverb, "you can lead a gift horse to the water but ya can't look in his mouth." - Archie Bunker

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse and make him wince; but, one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still. - Samuel Johnson

When you're young and you fall off a horse, you may break something. When you're my age and you fall off, you splatter. - Roy Rogers