Woman's Odometer

Women hold up half the sky. - Mao Zedong

Well-behaved women seldom make history. - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

Female Friends: Women mad at the same person - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When women go wrong, men go right after them. - Mae West

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. - Irina Dunn

When women enter middle age, it gives men a pause. - Unknown

To my embarrassment, I was born in bed with a lady. - Wilson Mizner

I hate women because they always know where things are. - Voltaire

We're women. We have a double standard to live up to. - Ally McBeal

A great city is that which has the greatest men and women. - Walt Whitman

My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flushes. - Robin Williams

As long as she thinks of a man, nobody objects to a woman thinking. - Virginia Woolf

Most women are afraid of clowns, but somehow end up still dating one. - Unknown

There is not so variable a thing in nature as a lady's head-dress. - Joseph Addison

When women kiss it always reminds one of prize fighters shaking hands. - H L Mencken

Women should not have children after 35. Really? 35 children is enough. - Bill Murray

No one but a woman in love ever sees the maximum of men's greatness. - Anais Nin

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

My mom told me a long time ago, 'Never get in a fight with a lady.' - Oliver North

Sidesaddle: How men, rather than women, would ride in a truly logical world - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent. - Erma Bombeck

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

Women give us solace, but if it were not for women we would never need solace. - Don Herold

My vigour, vitality, and cheek repel me. I am the kind of woman I would run from. - Nancy Astor

Glamour: The capacity of a woman to get more out of a dress than she puts into it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't. - Margaret Thatcher

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. - Helen Rowland

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

The true republic: men, their rights and nothing more; women, their rights and nothing less. - Franklin P Adams

Looking at how successful all the Kardashian women are, I don't blame Bruce Jenner at all. - Trevor Noah

By the time a woman realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong. - Unknown

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller

If women want any rights more than they got, why don't they just take them and not be talking about it? - Sojourner Truth

We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. - Groucho Marx

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer

The widening of woman's sphere is to improve her lot. Let us do it, and if the world scoff, let it scoff - if it sneer, let it sneer. - Lucy Stone

A beautiful woman moved in next door. So I went over and returned a cup of sugar. "You didn't borrow this." "I will." - Steven Wright

The 77 cents that women make for every dollar men earn makes a real difference to our families - families stretching to make every dollar count. - Barbara Mikulski