A Woman's Mind

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. - Ruth Bell Graham

Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland

This is a feminist bookstore. There is no humour section. - John Callahan

In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

I became a feminist as an alternative to becoming a masochist. - Sally Kempton

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

The more you invest in a marriage, the more valuable it becomes. - Amy Grant

A bachelor is one who enjoys the chase but does not eat the game. - Unknown

I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez

Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others. - Wayne Dyer

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

Most women are afraid of clowns, but somehow end up still dating one. - Unknown

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. - Sharon Stone

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

I love romance. I'm a sucker for it. I love it so much. It's pathetic. - Drew Barrymore

Want to improve your relationships? See love as a verb rather than as a feeling. - Stephen R. Covey

In marriage, being the right person is as important as finding the right person. - Wilbert Donald Gough

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck. - WC Fields

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin

Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else. - Nicholas Sparks

Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other. - Unknown

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming: 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it; 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. - Patrick Murra

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

I'm not sure which is harder on a relationship: sharing a dresser for three years, or sharing an iPhone charger for one day. - Unknown

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

A problem occurs when people want the benefits of a relationship with God without the responsibilities of a relationship with God. - Jim Herring

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

There are all kinds of ways for a relationship to be tested, even broken, some, irrevocably; it's the endings we're unprepared for. - Katherine Owen