Baby Brother For Christmas

Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

No one vinces me, baby - Michael Grant

Whoever is rich is my brother. - Russian Proverb

Quadruplets: Four crying out loud - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Rattlesnake: our prostrate brother. - Ambrose Bierce

A bambiraptor is a savage baby dear. - Alan Davies

Babies are such a nice way to start people. - Don Herold

Ever notice how baby shampoo smells like spring? - Toni Sorenson

I am a brother to dragons, and a companion to owls. - Bible

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Baby I paint the sky blue
My greatest creation was you. - Jay-Z

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it. - Frank A. Clark

The big lesson in life, baby, is never be scared of anyone or anything. - Frank Sinatra

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker

Baby: a loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. - Ronald Knox

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child. - Tina Brown

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. - Queen Victoria

Nothing so clearly discovers a spiritual man as his treatment of an erring brother. - Augustine

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

Chutzpapa: A father who wakes his wife at 4 a.m. so she can change the baby's diaper - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. - Enid Bagnold

The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

Since people are going to be living longer and getting older, they'll just have to learn how to be babies longer. - Andy Warhol

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

Our babies are like penguins; penguin babies can't exist unless more than one person is taking care of them. They just can't keep going. - Alison Gopnik