#1 humor site on the 'net

Best Diet Ever

Study and research proves that THIS is the Best Diet Ever!

Best Diet Ever thanks to Wayne Nowazek

A friend of mine is a nurse and she talked to me about the Atkins Diet, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, and the latest of course, The South Beach Diet. Seems the major priority, people want to accomplish this year is to lose weight. Since she is a nurse, she has done a lot of study and research on dieting. I TRULY think she has found the real answer to weight loss... And it is so SIMPLE, I don't know why, more people don't try this option!

QuotaBills
Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

Tacos are the food of genius. - Heather Brewer

The best food is whatever fills the belly. - Arab Proverb

Food is the most primitive form of comfort. - Sheila Graham

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

The heart, like the stomach, wants a varied diet. - Gustave Flaubert

Food is symbolic of love when words are inadequate. - Alan D Wolfe

I've probably tried every fad diet in the world. - Jenna Ushkowitz

Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is. - Irish Proverb

Food tastes best when you eat it with your own spoon. - Denmark Proverb

A balanced diet is a Cracker Jack cookie in each hand. - Joe-kster

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley Jr.

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

The cardiologist's diet: - If it tastes good, spit it out. - Unknown

Food for the body is not enough. There must be food for the soul. - Dorothy Day

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated by any other means. - Maimonides

Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying

We need more young people involved in farming because the future needs real food. - Helena Sylvester

Every single diet I ever fell off of was because of potatoes and gravy of some sort. - Dolly Parton

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it. - Jackie Gleason

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

I'm glad I don't have to hunt for my food. I don't even know where Sandwiches live. - Bill Murray

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches awaiting Easter. - Fran Lebowitz

Number theorists are like lotus-eaters – having once tasted of this food they can never give it up. - Leopold Kronecker

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

If music be the food of love, play on, give me excess of it; that surfeiting, the appetite may sicken, and so die. - William Shakespeare

A dark-chocolate truffle melts in my mouth, and I forget about everything else... even the fact that I'm on a diet. - Barbara Brooke

The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill. - Bryan Miller

I like simple food, seasoned with just salt, pepper, oil and vinegar. Complicated food and complicated lives are never good. - Sirio Maccioni

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

Every time you use the word 'healthy,' you lose. The key is to make yummy, delicious food that happens to be healthy. - Marcus Samuelsson

I like a well-roasted rotisserie chicken and eggs cooked various ways like sunny-side up or scrambled. It's comfort food for me. - Joel Robuchion

I'm off the diet, but not the treadmill. I speak as someone who's attempted to lose weight and get fit thrice before in my life. - Ronnie Screwvala

My daily diet consists of basically anything I think looks tasty, whether that's pizza, sushi, burgers, quesadillas. I like everything. - Cameron Dallas

How is it that mercury is not safe for food additives and Over the Counter drug products, but it is safe in our vaccines and dental amalgams? - Dan Burton

I like a quiet evening with family or friends over, great food and great discussion, and a lot of laughter. That's really what fills my tank. - Anna Eshoo


Hedge Race Car

Quebec Stop Sign

Perkatory

Bike Storage

Playground Child Eliminator

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Sidecar

Glass World - Where Plumbers Buy

Three Wise Women

Wrench Dinosaur

One More Drop

Idling Eric Idle

High Heel Diver

Rising To The Occasion

Annual Meeting of the Ontario Summer Tires Club

I See You

Get Off Your High Horse

Redneck Towing

Revenge of the Stallion

Rat Cut

Spot the Hidden Barred Owl

Smoking Hot Body

Billy the Eagle Owl

Star Wars Fisherman