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Church Sign Humour

Sign on for more Sunday humour

Church Sign Humour thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

Dear Jesus, do something. - Vladimir Nabokov

All of nature is God's art. - Dante

The secret to humor is surprise. - Aristotle

Without God life makes no sense. - Andrei Bitov

I find your lack of faith disturbing. - Darth Vader

The best way to get praise is to die. - Italian Proverb

God does not play dice with the universe. - Albert Einstein

When humor goes, there goes civilization. - Erma Bombeck

God will forgive me. That's his business. - Heinrich Heine

God is not interested in your art but, your heart. - Ifeanyi E. Onuoha

Humour is emotional chaos remembered in tranquility. - James Thurber

People ask for criticism, but they only want praise. - W Somerset Maugham

If you desire praise or esteem, endeavor to merit it. - Norman MacDonald

If God is the author of life, there must be a script. - Ravi Zacharias

Spring shows what God can do with a drab and dirty world. - Virgil A Kraft

God is at home, it's we who have gone out for a walk. - Meister Eckhart

A sense of humour is the ability to laugh at one's self. - Charlie Chaplin

And if I please you so, my lover, remember praise is comely. - Countee Cullen

Don't be afraid to pray big prayers, we serve a big God. - Unknown

All our fret and worry is caused by calculating without God. - Oswald Chambers

Those who have the disease called Jesus will never be cured. - Brennan Manning

God does not require we be successful, only that we be faithful. - Mother Teresa

Nothing spoils a romance so much as a sense of humor in the woman. - Oscar Wilde

The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.' - Kinky Friedman

Praise follows truth afar off, and only overtakes her at the grave. - James R Lowell

Where man sees but withered leaves, God sees sweet flowers growing. - Albert Laighton

God is our refuge and our strength, a very present help in trouble. - Bible

A pun is the lowest form of humor, unless you thought of it yourself. - Doug Larson

Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be. - Sonia Ricotti

You can have faith or you can have control, but you cannot have both. - Mark Batterson

I think that God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability. - Oscar Wilde

God created Adam lord of all living creatures, but Eve spoiled it all. - Martin Luther

Unless you assume a God, the question of life's purpose is meaningless. - Bertrand Russell

I suppose the best kind of spring morning is the best weather God has to offer. - Dodie Smith

Faith is much better than belief. Belief is when someone else does the thinking. - R Buckminster Fuller

I am totally convinced the Christian faith is the most coherent worldview around. - Ravi Zacharias

Humor can alter any situation and help us cope at the very instant we are laughing. - Allen Klein

Easter is the demonstration of God that life is essentially spiritual and timeless. - Charles M Crowe

It is the ability to take a joke, not make one, that proves you have a sense of humor. - Max Eastman

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence. - Bertrand Russell

I used to think that one of the great signs of security was the ability to just walk away. - Jack Nicholson

Don't tell God that you have a big problem, tell your problem that you have a big God :) - Unknown

Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous. - Thornton Wilder

God isn't asking you to figure it out. He's asking you to trust that He already has. - Unknown

In hard seasons, God is not trying to destroy you. He is trying to bring the best out of you. - Unknown

Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence. - Helen Keller

Faith is to believe what you do not yet see; the reward for this faith is to see what you believe. - Saint Augustine

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. - Bible

We would worry less if we praised more. Thanksgiving is the enemy of discontent and dissatisfaction. - Harry Ironside

I really do believe that God is love, one of deep affection and grace and forgiveness and inspiration. - William P Young

If you're going down the street and you're going the wrong way, remember - God permits U-turns. - Suze Orman

He made us all one true religion, Edith, which he named after his son, Christian - or Christ, for short. - Archie Bunker

Prayer is not about letting God know your will; it's about completely submitting to him. You die to yourself. - Mark Batterson

A small body of determined spirits fired by an unquenchable faith in their mission can alter the course of history. - Mahatma Gandhi

Faith is belief in what you cannot see or prove or touch. Faith is walking face-first and full-speed into the dark. - Elizabeth Gilbert

When humor works, it works because it's clarifying what people already feel. It has to come from someplace real. - Tina Fey

It is from the Bible that man has learned cruelty, rapine, and murder; for the belief of a cruel God makes a cruel man. - Thomas Paine

Faith isn't about always having all the answers. Faith is about believing that God will always come through for you. - Unknown

We study the glory of God, and the honour and liberty of parliament, for which we fight, without seeking our own interests. - Oliver Cromwell

When faith replaces doubt, when selfless service eliminates selfish striving, the power of God brings to pass His purposes. - Thomas S Monson

God proved His love on the Cross. When Christ hung, and bled, and died, it was God saying to the world, 'I love you.' - Billy Graham

People are so shocked when they find... out I am Protestant. I am Presbyterian. And I go to church, and I love God, and I love my church. - Donald Trump

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

Charity may be a very short word, but with its tremendous meaning of pure love, it sums up man's entire relation to God and to his neighbor. - Aelred of Rievaulx

Dark Side Bus Stop

Only in Las Vegas

Sailing Duck

Redneck Stairs

Computer Challenged

1st Rolex

Tennis Plant

Florida Moves Out Of Hurricane Zone

Small Bills

Denmark Traffic Signals

Nail Polish Lookalilikes

Game Car

Overloaded Mailbox

Redneck Phone

Enjoy Fresh Air

Bread Board


Mini Bar

Frisbee Stopper

Redneck Sushi

Redneck's Lo-Tech Mobile Phone


Border Agent Alert

Cadillac Clearance