#1 humor site on the 'net

Fat Friend Prayer

True friends wish the same for you...

Fat Friend Prayer thanks to Phoebe Moll,Raub, North Dakota

QuotaBills
Old friends are best. - John Selden

Friends are the sunshine of life. - John Hay

Have no friends not equal to yourself. - Confucius

There is no friend as loyal as a book. - Ernest Hemingway

Be true to your work, your word, and your friend. - Henry David Thoreau

The bird a nest, the spider a web, man friendship. - William Blake

May the hinges of our friendship never grow rusty. - Irish Blessing

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A friend is someone with whom you dare to be yourself. - Frank Crane

Those who seek faultless friends will remain friendless. - Unknown

If you make friends with yourself you will never be alone. - Maxwell Maltz

A friend is someone who makes you feel totally acceptable. - Ene Riisna

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? - Steven Wright

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

I don't mind that I'm fat. You still get the same money. - Marlon Brando

To like and dislike the same things, that is indeed true friendship. - Sallust

I am a great friend of public amusements; they keep people from vice. - Samuel Johnson

Friends are lost by calling too often and by not calling often enough. - French Proverb

Don't abuse your friends and expect them to consider it criticism. - Ed Howe

True friends don't judge each other, they judge other people together. - Unknown

Next to acquiring good friends, the best acquisition is that of good books. - Charles Caleb Colton

What you see before you, my friend, is the result of a lifetime of chocolate. - Katharine Hepburn

My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs. - Steven Wright

Who ever hears of fat men heading a riot, or herding together in turbulent mobs? - Washington Irving

Never explain. Your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe it anyway. - Elbert Hubbard

A grandmother is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher, and a little bit best friend. - Unknown

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is to understand and to be understood. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

I like to put on a wig or a fake mustache and do something silly with friends, do a little dance. - Tom Lenk

Senescence begins
And middle-age ends,
The day your descendants
Outnumber your friends. - Ogden Nash

We challenge one another to be funnier and smarter ... It's the way friends make love to one another. - Annie Gottlieb

He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare, and he who has one enemy shall meet him everywhere. - Ali ibn-Abi-Talib

Don't make friends who are comfortable to be with. Make friends who will force you to lever yourself up. - Thomas J. Watson Sr.

The friend that always finds time to spend with you without consulting his or her calendar is a true friend. - Ellen J. Barrier

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner. - WC Fields

Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat, lazy, or stupid. Those things are what happen when you don't have a plan. - Larry Winget

A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will help you move a body - let me know if I ever need to bring a shovel. - Unknown

A loyal friend laughs at your jokes when they're not so good, and sympathizes with your problems when they're not so bad. - Arnold H. Glasow

The process of falling in love at first sight is as final as it is swift in such a case, but the growth of true friendship may be a lifelong affair. - Sarah O Jewett


Who Needs Physics?

Benched Puppies

Water Relief

Shot Glasses

Men in Denim

Chocolate Couch

Ant Attack

Extreme Pressure Cooker

Just Thinking

Nothing Wrong Picture

Lipstick Dog

Hair Strengthener

Whale Photobomb

World Peas

Hide and Seek

Hoodie Onesy

Going Around In Circles

Whiskey Jig

Redneck Mercedes

Hala Fruit

Hydro Water Power

Selfie Shoes

Tons Of Anarchy

Science World