#1 humor site on the 'net

Grass Walker

'Turf's Up' for this guy's plan to greenerize the city

Grass Walker thanks to Bob Tasse

QuotaBills
Hope is a walking dream. - Aristotle

He who limps is still walking. - Joan Rivers

I walk slowly but never backwards. - Abraham Lincoln

As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party. - Proverb

A lawn is nature under totalitarian rule. - Michael Pollan

He who hurries can not walk with dignity. - Chinese Proverb

Hiking in undiscovered places is a lot of fun. - Karolina Kurkova

Speed is not a priority, just enjoy your hike. - Barry Putra

Some people walk in the rain, others just get wet. - Roger Miller

Jesus was a hiker. The wilderness was His retreat. - Toni Sorenson

Big sisters are the crab grass in the lawn of life. - Charles M. Schulz

Walk as if you are kissing the Earth with your feet. - Thich Nhat Hanh

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time. - Steven Wright

When two elephants fight it is the grass that gets trampled. - African Proverb

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks. - John Muir

I love hiking, paddle boarding and listening to the Veronicas. - Bindi Irwin

I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying. - Charlie Chaplin

Keep on with hope in your heart, and you'll never walk alone. - Rukh Khan

If you're already walking on thin ice, you might as well dance. - Proverb

We cannot walk alone... We cannot turn back... I have a dream today! - Martin Luther King Jr

Hiking's not for everyone. Notice the wilderness is mostly empty. - Sonja Yoerg

The bodies in my floor all trusted someone. Now I walk on them to tea. - Victoria Schwab

I always thought a yard was three feet, then I started mowing the lawn. - C.E. Cowman

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

Walk boldly and wisely... there is a hand above that will help thee on. - Philip James Bailey

Books are no different from goats - they enjoy an afternoon out on the lawn. - Kate Bernheimer

If you don't like the road you're walking, start paving another one. - Dolly Parton

It's better to walk alone, than with a crowd going in the wrong direction. - Diane Grant

If grass can grow through cement, love can find you at every time in your life. - Cher

Ever hear of the old saying, "grass don't grow on a busy street?" - Archie Bunker

There are no wrong turnings. Only paths we had not known we were meant to walk. - Guy Gavriel Kay

People think I have an interesting walk. Hell, I am just trying to hold my gut in. - Robert Mitchum

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance. - Tim Allen

Raising boys is like raising puppies. One must take them for a walk every few hours. - Jody Defries

Never give advice unless you have walked the walk, because anybody can talk the talk. - Valencia Mackie

Imagination, of course, can open any door - turn the key and let terror walk right in. - Truman Capote

Every time you walk down the street people are screaming, "You're fired!" - Donald Trump

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth. - Chinese Proverb

The church is close, but the road is icey. The tavern is far, but I will walk carefully. - Russian Proverb

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

Samson, he takes the jawbone out of the grass and he kills the whole army of the Phillipines. - Archie Bunker

Drama does not just walk into our lives. Either we create it, invite it, or associate with it. - Brandi L. Bates

There's one good thing about snow: it makes your lawn look as nice as your neighbor's. - Clyde Moore

Men are like linoleum floors. Lay 'em right and you can walk all over them for thirty years. - Betsy Salkind

I can imagine few worse fates than walking around for the rest of one's life wearing a typo. - Anne Fadiman

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

We will walk the path not of retribution or revenge but the path of reconciliation and forgiveness. - Mahatma Gandhi

You don't go walking into the proverbial lion's den lightly. You start with a good breakfast. - Jim Butcher

The heights charm us, but the steps do not; with the mountain in our view we love to walk the plains. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Respect yourself to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy. - Unknown

Walk away from anything or anyone who takes away from your joy. Life is too short to put up with fools. - Unknown

I asked the waiter, "Is this milk fresh?" He said, "Lady, three hours ago it was grass." - Phyllis Diller

All you have to do is look straight and see the road, and when you see it, don't sit looking at it - walk. - Ayn Rand

The effective leader recognizes that they are more dependent on their people than they are on them. Walk softly. - Brian Tracy

The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark

Faith is belief in what you cannot see or prove or touch. Faith is walking face-first and full-speed into the dark. - Elizabeth Gilbert

If you're walking down the right path and you're willing to keep walking, eventually you'll make progress. - Barack Obama

May you always walk in sunshine. May you never want for more. May Irish angels rest their wings right beside your door. - Irish Blessings

Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend. - Albert Camus

Returning home is the most difficult part of long-distance hiking. You have grown outside the puzzle and your piece no longer fits. - Cindy Ross

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

One day you will ask me which is more important? My life or yours? I will say mine and you will walk away not knowing that you are my life. - Khalil Gibran

The great outdoors is a theme with me; a walking holiday in Scotland is perfect - Culloden and the forests of Aviemore are both favourites. - Erin O'Connor

Never design your character like a garden where anyone can walk. Design your character like the sky where everyone's desire is to reach. - Unknown

It was one of the most ancient terrors, the one that meant that no sooner had mankind learned to walk on two legs than it dropped to its knees. - Terry Pratchett

From lessening negativity to boosting creativity, hiking in fresh air actually boosts brain power and can help certain parts of the brain grow. - Meredith Carey

Think while walking, walk while thinking, and let writing be but the light pause, as the body on a walk rests in contemplation of wide open spaces. - Frederic Gros

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. - Phyllis Diller

When I walk down the street in New York, the building constructor, the guy pounding cement and what not, will yell, "Hey, you hockey puck!" - Don Rickles


Mac Supports Windows

Me First!

Latest Ukrainian Model

Chocolate Bath

Becoming A Cop

Handicap Swing

Lawn Aeration

Soup Of The Day

Black Eye

Teen Shoe

He Wants In

Who's Watching Whom?

Wine Glass Chair

Flight Change

No Feeding

How It's Done

Toad Selfie

Daily Rain Gauge

RSVP

France-Is Bacon

Do Not Touch Sign

Giant Step For Mankind

SirLoin

On This Site in 1897