New Wal-Mart Mirror

The best mirror is an old friend. - Peter Nivio Zarlenga

A friend's eye is a good mirror. - Irish Proverb

My diet is like Atkins, but with the carbs. - BJ Penn

Smoking cures weight problems... eventually. - Steven Wright

Tears at times have all the weight of speech. - Ovid

I'm not gaining weight. I'm living large. - Unknown

My weight is perfect for my height - which varies. - Unknown

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet. - Unknown

I xeroxed a mirror. Now I have an extra xerox machine. - Steven Wright

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

Natural beauty takes at least two hours in front of a mirror. - Pamela Anderson

The cardiologist's diet: - If it tastes good, spit it out. - Unknown

I look in the mirror through the eyes of the child that was me. - Judy Collins

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. - Totie Fields

If you can't see anything beautiful about yourself, get a better mirror. - Shane Koyczan

I gotta lose weight, Edith. I hope you remembered my diuretic cottage cheese. - Archie Bunker

Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person. - Chanakya

You use a glass mirror to see your face; you use works of art to see your soul. - George Bernard Shaw

Life is a mirror, and what you see out there, you must first see inside of you. - Wally Amos

You can't lose weight by talking about it. You have to keep your mouth shut. - Old Farmer's Almanac

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

I'm paranoid about everything. On my stationary bike I have a rearview mirror. - Richard Lewis

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis

There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. - Edith Wharton

If you want to know who is going to change this country, go home and look in the mirror. - Maude Barlow

I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. - Steven Wright

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

I have a Rubik's Cube for a rearview mirror, because the past is the only time puzzle I can solve. - Jarod Kintz

I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what they think of me?' - Drew Carey

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

Attract what you expect,
Reflect what you desire,
Become what you respect,
Mirror what you admire. - Unknown

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

Confidence is beautiful, no matter your size, no matter your weight. Be confident in who you are and you'll be beautiful. - Unknown

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock