#1 humor site on the 'net

Puffin Mouthful

For days when you bite off more than you can chew

Puffin Mouthful thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Mouth-to-mouth restitution - Archie Bunker

All men are equal before fish. - Herbert Hoover

A closed mouth catches no flies. - French Proverb

I have laid aside business, and gone a'fishing. - Izaak Walton

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain. - Mark Twain

She has the eyes of Caligula, but the mouth of Marilyn Monroe. - Francois Mitterrand

Ideal Summer Resort: A place where fish bite and mosquitoes don't - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A lawyer is an odd sort of fish, first rotten, then green, then ripe. - Robert Christy

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

I am fiercely loyal to those willing to put their money where my mouth is. - Paul Harvey

Any man who puts his intelligence up against a fish and loses had it coming. - John Steinbeck

I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge? - Douglas Adams

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut. - Sam Rayburn

The heart of a fool is in his mouth, but the mouth of a wise man is in his heart. - Benjamin Franklin

I'd say that the Meathead probably got magnesia and forgot where his mouth was. - Archie Bunker

When you speak to a man, look on his eyes; when he speaks to thee, look on his mouth. - Benjamin Franklin

There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. - Steven Wright

Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after. - Henry David Thoreau

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. - Ernest Hemingway

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx

It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt. - Groucho Marx

The opposite for courage is not cowardice, it is conformity. Even a dead fish can go with the flow. - Jim Hightower

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

More contact means more sharing of information, gossiping, exchanging, engaging - in short, more word of mouth. - Gary Vaynerchuk

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, then it just becomes a soap opera. - Unknown

Luck affects everything; let your hook always be cast. In the stream where you least expect it, there will be fish. - Ovid

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

A dark-chocolate truffle melts in my mouth, and I forget about everything else... even the fact that I'm on a diet. - Barbara Brooke

Tooth decay was a perennial problem that meant a mouthful of silver for patients, and for dentists a pocketful of gold. - Claudia Wallis

Fishing Trip: Journey undertaken by one or more anglers to a place where no one can remember when it has rained so much - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

"Exercise" is such a dirty word in my household that whenever I even think of it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate. - Leonore Fleischer

Somebody just back of you while you are fishing is as bad as someone looking over your shoulder while you write a letter to your girl. - Ernest Hemingway

The English eat all sorts of birds - pigeons, ducks, sparrows - but if you tell them you eat puffin, you might as well come from Mars. - Bjork

Dontopedalogy is the science of opening your mouth and putting your foot in it, a science which I have practiced for a good many years. - Prince Philip

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo


SnowCut

Umbrella For Two

Sink Drinker

Pilot Lounge

Pedal Operated Washing Machine

Just Chillin' Out

Bee Prepared

Work Siesta

Cold Books

Zebra Keyboard

Sing It Out

Cold One

Cheerful Trees

Rooftop Steps

Racing a 'Hot Rod'

Nemo Found at Japanese Sushi Bar

Painting The Center Line

Kitchen Recycling

Work Not

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Car-nage

Noah's 2021 Ark

First Dodge Ram

Redneck Wedding Limo