Redneck House Cleaning

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

Operatics: Bugs that live in an opera house - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A spotless house is a sign of a misspent life. - Unknown

There will be no whitewash at the White House. - Richard M Nixon

At my house, Dust is a noun, not a verb. - Unknown

There are no elevators in the house of success. - H.H. Vreeland

Choose your neighbor before you buy your house. - African Proverb

He'd go through the house like Typhoon Mary. - Archie Bunker

Hot flushes and mentalpause. House of ill refute. - Archie Bunker

The words you speak become the house you live in. - Hafiz

Better a hundred enemies outside the house than one inside. - Arabic proverb

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

Give a landlord an inch and he'll build an apartment house. - American Proverb

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. - George Carlin

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

Your own safety is at stake when your neighbor's house is in flames. - Horace

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Don't talk about a rope in the house of someone whose father was hung. - Colin Farrell

In the haunted house of life, art is the only stair that doesn't creak. - Tom Robbins

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

I went to a haunted house, looked under the kitchen table, and found spirit gum. - Steven Wright

I love contemporary art, although I wouldn't want a pickled shark in my house. - Bruno Tonioli

What is the use of a house if you haven’t got a tolerable planet to put it on? - Henry David Thoreau

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House. - Robin Williams

Maybe I'd like to run around the house in my drawers, and with her here, I felt inhabited. - Archie Bunker

I want a house with a garden, but slap bang in the centre of London. Next door to a sushi bar. - Michelle Dockery

If we build in the desert, let the house know the desert and the desert be proud of the house. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Window Screen: 1. A device to prevent the escape of insects; 2. A device for keeping flies in the house. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house. - Rod Stewart

I'm 42 around the chest, 52 around the waist, 92 around the golf course, and a nuisance around the house. - Groucho Marx

When I moved out of my mom's house at 18 I was almost as sad to leave her sewing machine behind as anything else. - Beth Ditto

Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken and there's a lot of throwing up. - Ray Romano

I am like a pelican of the wilderness: I am like an owl of the desert. I watch, and am as a sparrow alone upon the house-top. - Bible

Every woman's dream is that a man will take her in his arms, throw her into bed... and clean the whole house while she sleeps. - Unknown

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Science is built up with facts, as a house is with stones. But a collection of facts is no more a science than a heap of stones is a house. - Jules H Poincare