#1 humor site on the 'net

Redneck House Cleaning

Now Bubba digs housework!

Redneck House Cleaning thanks to Bob Tasse

QuotaBills
Art is a house that tries to be haunted. - Emily Dickinson

Oscar night at my house is called Passover. - Bob Hope

A man in the house is worth two in the street. - Mae West

At my house, Dust is a noun, not a verb. - Unknown

Choose your neighbor before you buy your house. - African Proverb

He'd go through the house like Typhoon Mary. - Archie Bunker

Hot flushes and mentalpause. House of ill refute. - Archie Bunker

Without love, the rich and poor live in the same house. - Unknown

He that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind. - The Bible

Better a hundred enemies outside the house than one inside. - Arabic proverb

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

An empty purse and a new house make a man wise, but too late. - Portuguese Proverb

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. - George Carlin

In my house I'm the boss. My wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen

Hidin' out in the house all the time, like some Bantam of the Opera. - Archie Bunker

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Don't talk about a rope in the house of someone whose father was hung. - Colin Farrell

When the snake is in the house, one need not discuss the matter at length. - African Saying

In the haunted house of life, art is the only stair that doesn't creak. - Tom Robbins

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

What is the use of a house if you haven’t got a tolerable planet to put it on? - Henry David Thoreau

If you want to see me, come over anytime. If you want to see my house, make an appointment. - Unknown

If you burn your neighbor's house down, it doesn't make your house look any better. - Lou Holtz

So finally, the great Jefferson, who always reclined to cross my freshhold is into the house. - Archie Bunker

I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. - Steven Wright

If we build in the desert, let the house know the desert and the desert be proud of the house. - Frank Lloyd Wright

The fantasy of every Australian man is to have two women - one cleaning and the other dusting. - Maurenn Murphy

It's not my fault I was dragged out of my house by a mob and forced to predict the weather. - Punxsutawney Phil

Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler. - WC Fields

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

I have a microwave fireplace in my house... The other night I laid down in front of the fire for the evening in two minutes. - Steven Wright

Hockey on roller skates is like MMA in a bounce house: the elements are there, but the medium makes the whole thing ridiculous. - David Walton

Talking is a hydrant in the yard and writing is a faucet upstairs in the house. Opening the first takes the pressure off the second. - Robert Frost

I was born by Caesarian section... but not so you'd notice. It's just that when I leave a house, I go out through the window. - Steven Wright

If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him with, "Who could have done this? We have no enemies." - Phyllis Diller

Science is built of facts the way a house is built of bricks; but an accumulation of facts is no more science than a pile of bricks is a house. - Henri Poincare

Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion... I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward. - Kurt Vonnegut

This is a honeydew day. That is when you get a day off and the wife says, "Honey, do this," and "Honey, do that" around the house. - Jim Lemon


Coffee Caricature

The Working Man

North of Somewhere

Salmon Bikini

Mexican Phys Ed Classes

Parasite Trivia

Plug Puller

Steamworks Bathroom

Another Repost

Pipeline Protesters

Bread Gloves

Winterpeg Warm

Pen Sale Not

Soda Bottle Boat

Raccoon Rock

Cement Truck Lane

Air Wakanda

Birthday Bonus

Harrison Ford

Better Start In Life

Husband Makes Lunch

Bottle Curtains

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles