#1 humor site on the 'net

Redneck Lottery Tour

What Bubba did when he won the lottery

Redneck Lottery Tour thanks to Irvin Kauffman

Redneck Lottery Tour thanks to Irvin Kauffman

QuotaBills
The first wealth is health. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Wars are caused by undefended wealth. - Ernest Hemingway

Every man is the architect of his own fortune. - Sallust

The rich are different - they have more money. - Ernest Hemingway

I don't think you can spend yourself rich. - George Humphrey

Fortune favors the bold but abandons the timid. - Latin Proverb

Traffic Ticket: Finale of the policeman's bawl - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Winning is a habit, but unfortunately so is losing. - Vince Lombardi

The key to winning is to be brilliant at the basics. - Vince Lombardi

Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing. - Vince Lombardi

Without love, the rich and poor live in the same house. - Unknown

Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something. - Wilson Mizner

An unhurried sense of time is in itself a form of wealth. - Bonnie Friedman

There is no downside to winning. It feels forever fabulous. - Pat Conroy

Life is a wheel of fortune and it's my turn to spin it. - Tupac

Few rich men own their own property. The property owns them. - Robert G Ingersoll

You can't get rich in politics unless you're a crook. - Harry S Truman

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

No warning can save a people determined to grow suddenly rich. - Lord Overstone

Fond of lawsuits, little wealth; fond of doctors, little health. - Hebrew Proverb

Dublin University contains the cream of Ireland - rich and thick. - Samuel Beckett

Next to trying and winning, the best thing is trying and failing. - L M Montgomery

A champion is afraid of losing. Everyone else is afraid of winning. - Billie Jean King

Don't fight a battle if you don't gain anything by winning. - Edwin Rommel

Hesitation increases in relation to risk in equal proportion to age. - Ernest Hemingway

Winning may not be everything, but losing has little to recommend it. - Dianne Feinstein

Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise. - Benjamin Franklin

Many wealthy people are little more than janitors of their possessions. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Fortune, seeing that she could not make fools wise, has made them lucky. - Michel de Montaigne

Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead. - James Thurber

It's harder for a poor man to be successful than it is for a rich man. - Gregory Nunn

We are rich only through what we give, and poor only through what we refuse. - Anne-Sophie Swetchine

The woman who can create her own job is the one who will win fame and fortune. - Amelia Earhart

No one ever says, "It's only a game" when their team is winning. - George Carlin

A rich rogue is like a fat hog, who never does good 'til as dead as a log. - Benjamin Franklin

American Politics: A form of socialism for the rich, including the politicians. - Gregory Nunn

Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go. - T S Eliot

Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune. - Jim Rohn

Common sense is just as good a critic of the lottery as any statistical breakdown. - Hunter Baker

The key to winning baseball games is pitching, fundamentals, and three-run homers. - Unknown

I think we risk becoming the best-informed society that has ever died of ignorance. - Ruben Blades

How easy it is for a man to die rich, if he will but be contented to live miserable. - Henry Fielding

If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary. - Jim Rohn

There are two types of risk in life: the danger of trying and the danger of not trying. - Nick Vujicic

It is neither wealth nor splendor, but tranquility and occupation, which give happiness. - Thomas Jefferson

You cannot sift out the poor from the community. The poor are indispensable to the rich. - Henry Ward Beacher

Progress always involves risk; you can't steal second base and keep your foot on first. - Frederick Wilcox

So often in life, things that you regard as an impediment turn out to be great good fortune. - Ruth Bader Ginsburg

It isn't necessary to be rich and famous to be happy. It's only necessary to be rich. - Alan Alda

Bill Gates is a very rich man today, and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions. - Dave Barry

If we command our wealth, we shall be rich and free; if our wealth commands us, we are poor indeed. - Edmund Burke

Whether you're having setbacks or not, the role of a leader is to always display a winning attitude. - Colin Powell

The hardest thing about any political campaign is how to win without proving that you are unworthy of winning. - Theodor Adorno

When you're my age, you just never risk being ill - because then everyone says, "Oh, he's done for." - John Gielgud

People shop and learn in a whole new way compared to just a few years ago, so marketers need to adapt or risk extinction. - Brian Halligan

Everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer. - Jim Carrey

Life is inherently risky. There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing. - Denis Waitley

If you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers! - Homer Simpson

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

The greatness of a man is not how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively. - Bob Marley

Animals are not our selfie props. If there's any risk that your photo is going to hurt or stress an animal, it's not worth it. - Angela Henderson

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer

Never play with the feelings of others, because you may win the game, but the risk is that you will surely lose the person for life time. - William Shakespeare

Health is the finest possession. Contentment is the ultimate wealth. Trustworthy people are the best relatives. Unbinding is the supreme ease. - Buddha

It is a matter of whether one wants to get rich or be rich. We can be rich in Christ Jesus or perhaps get rich in Egypt, but we cannot do both. - Vance Havner


Vatican City's New Breakfast Special

Flying Cathedral Excuse

Day At The Beach

John The Baptist Souvenirs

Amish Prom Limo

Wishy-Washy Church

'Cover Girl' Magazine

One At A Time

Shofar So Good

Temple Car

Closing Time

Wine Glass Lanyard

Awning Truck Advertising

Plugged In

Org Chart - Simplified Version

Extreme Value

Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers

Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine

Redneck Engagement Ring