Redneck Wedding Cake

Marry money. - Max Shulman

Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers

Life is too short to skip cake. - Unknown

Marry in haste, repent at leisure. - English Proverb

Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown

One does not marry art. One ravishes it. - Edgar Degas

Cantaloupe: Got to get married in Church - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A really good detective never gets married. - Raymond Chandler

Cake is the answer, no matter the question. - Unknown

Don't marry for money; divorce for money. - Wendy Liebman

If you marry for money you will earn every penny. - Dr. Phil McGraw

Marry me and I'll never look at another horse! - Groucho Marx

The woman cries before the wedding and the man after. - Polish Proverb

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson

Second Marriage: The triumph of hope over experience. - Samuel Johnson

There is nothing so difficult to marry as a large nose. - Oscar Wilde

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx

Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake. - Larry Hagman

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

I eat cake because it's somebody's birthday somewhere. - Unknown

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. - Sam Kinison

I would rather be a beggar and single than a queen and married. - Queen Elizabeth I

I'll never forget my wedding day... they threw vitamin pills. - Groucho Marx

Writing is only the frosting on my cake. I'm whole without it. - Tabitha King

The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle

A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

Never marry anyone you could not sit next to during a three-day bus trip. - Roger Ebert

I believe in love and marriage, but not necessarily with the same person. - John Travolta

My idea of baking is buying a ready-make cake mix and throwing in an egg. - Cilla Black

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. - Unknown

The Pirate is surrealism and so, in a curious way, is Father of the Bride. - Vincente Minnelli

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence

My favourite place to eat is my grandma's kitchen. She makes a mean crab cake. - Karlie Kloss

A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. - John Steinbeck

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. - Rita Rudner

When someone asks if you'd like cake or pie, why not say you want cake and pie? - Lisa Loeb

Marriage is the harmony of God synchronizing two wills with the will of the Father. - Ravi Zacharias

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Whether you wind up with a nest egg or a goose egg depends on the kind of chick you married. - Unknown

A bad review is like baking a cake with all the best ingredients and having someone sit on it. - Danielle Steel

Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without the emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both. - Ravi Zacharias

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. - Phyllis Diller

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

Rituals are important. Nowadays it's hip not to be married. I'm not interested in being hip. - John Lennon

The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. - Oscar Wilde

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. - Phyllis Diller

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison

I married for love. But the obvious side benefit of having someone around to find my glasses cannot be ignored. - Cameron Esposito

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.' - Jerry Seinfeld

It's a piece of cake until you get to the top. You find you can't stop playing the game the way you've always played it. - Richard M Nixon

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. - Robert Anderson

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you never want to see a man again, just tell him, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have children." They leave skid marks. - Rita Rudner

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf