Redneck Wedding Cake

Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers

Life is too short to skip cake. - Unknown

Grace: nutrient in the marriage garden - Phil Callaway

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

Call no man unhappy until he is married. - Socrates

To marry the Irish is to look for poverty. - J.P. Donleavy

I am putting real plums into an imaginary cake. - Mary McCarthy

Make love, not war... or get married and do both. - Unknown

In married life three is company and two is none. - Oscar Wilde

Marry me and I'll never look at another horse! - Groucho Marx

Gentlemen who prefer blondes usually marry brunettes. - Unknown

Veiled Threat: When your girlfriend hints at a wedding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is nothing so difficult to marry as a large nose. - Oscar Wilde

Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb

In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

A lot of movies are about life, mine are like a slice of cake. - Alfred Hitchcock

I'll never forget my wedding day... they threw vitamin pills. - Groucho Marx

I've been married twice but I haven't had a marriage yet. - Jennifer Lopez

All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much. - George Harrison

Writing is only the frosting on my cake. I'm whole without it. - Tabitha King

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. - Mae West

Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife. - Shelley Winters

A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison

A man is often too young to marry, but a man is never too old to love. - Finnish Proverb

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry. - Oscar Wilde

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

The Pirate is surrealism and so, in a curious way, is Father of the Bride. - Vincente Minnelli

A great empire, like a great cake, is most easily diminished at the edges. - Benjamin Franklin

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor

Bachelors: Married men may have better halves, but bachelors have better quarters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When someone asks if you'd like cake or pie, why not say you want cake and pie? - Lisa Loeb

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

This is a Jewish cake - they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets circumscribed. - Archie Bunker

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin

Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

If you meet someone who can cook and do housework, don't hesitate a minute - marry him! - Rita Rudner

I'm a very committed wife. I should be committed, too, for being married so many times. - Elizabeth Taylor

A good marriage was one in which each person thought he or she was getting the better deal. - Anne Lamott

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. - Cher

First of all you’ve got to have talent. And then you've got to marry her like I did. - George Burns

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation. - Mark Twain

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

Marriage is like a beleaguered fortress: those who are outside want to get in, and those inside want to get out. - French Proverb

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. - Albert Einstein

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. - Elayne Boosler

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married? - Barbara Streisand

There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about. - Oscar Wilde

A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. - Paul Sweeney

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is. - Milton Berle

When I was a young man I vowed never to marry until I found the ideal woman. Well, I found her but, alas, she was waiting for the ideal man. - Alain

Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx