QuotaBillsMarry money. - Max Shulman
A married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb
Grace: nutrient in the marriage garden - Phil Callaway
A party without cake is just a meeting. - Julia Child
Cantaloupe: Got to get married in Church - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A really good detective never gets married. - Raymond Chandler
Cake is the answer, no matter the question. - Unknown
Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg
Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen
Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. - Gloria Steinem
Getting married is an incredible act of hopefulness. - Ashley Judd
The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love. - Joe E Lewis
My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson
Gentlemen who prefer blondes usually marry brunettes. - Unknown
Veiled Threat: When your girlfriend hints at a wedding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx
Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake. - Larry Hagman
The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington
False Economy: using only 30 candles on her 40th birthday cake - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. - Sam Kinison
All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner. - Red Skelton
Writing is only the frosting on my cake. I'm whole without it. - Tabitha King
The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle
A girl must marry for love, and keep on marrying until she finds it. - Zsa Zsa Gabor
A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison
Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields
A man is often too young to marry, but a man is never too old to love. - Finnish Proverb
I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. - Red Skelton
Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman
Marriage is too interesting an experiment to be tried only once or twice. - Eva Gabor
Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty
Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. - F.M. Knowles
My idea of baking is buying a ready-make cake mix and throwing in an egg. - Cilla Black
A nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me. - Audrey Hepburn
Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman
I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel
I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence
Bachelors: Married men may have better halves, but bachelors have better quarters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. - John Steinbeck
Well, at least he has found his true love - what a pity he can't marry himself. - Frank Sinatra
My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. - Rita Rudner
Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert
How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde
Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis
We have always said that advertising is just the icing on the cake. It is not the cake. - Meg Whitman
Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker
Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci
Today couples live together until they learn to detest one another. Then they get married. - G K Chesterton
Whether you wind up with a nest egg or a goose egg depends on the kind of chick you married. - Unknown
First of all you’ve got to have talent. And then you've got to marry her like I did. - George Burns
Everything slows down with age. Except the time it takes cake and ice cream to reach your hips. - John Wagner
For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones
Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard for the night, she can still survive. - WC Fields
I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley
You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy
Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories. - John Wilmot
Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day. - Mickey Rooney
Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash
Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. - Albert Einstein
I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. - Elayne Boosler
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them. - Ogden Nash
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw
Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you. - Helen Rowland