Wedding Pound Cake

I could eat my body weight in sushi. - Mikey Way

A party without cake is just a meeting. - Julia Child

Romance is the icing, the love is the cake. - Unknown

Smoking cures weight problems... eventually. - Steven Wright

Tears at times have all the weight of speech. - Ovid

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

I'm not gaining weight. I'm living large. - Unknown

My weight is perfect for my height - which varies. - Unknown

She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. - Margot Asquith

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet. - Unknown

Why y'all duded up lookin' like Errol Slim? - Archie Bunker

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson

Hand Scanner: Singles bar prowler looking for wedding rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

A lot of movies are about life, mine are like a slice of cake. - Alfred Hitchcock

All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much. - George Harrison

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

My metabolism stinks. I can gain weight just listening to dinner music. - Ron Dentinger

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. - Totie Fields

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated by any other means. - Maimonides

The majority of my diet is made up of the foods that my kid didn't finish. - Carrie Underwood

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

When someone asks if you'd like cake or pie, why not say you want cake and pie? - Lisa Loeb

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake. - Mitch Hedberg

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis

We have always said that advertising is just the icing on the cake. It is not the cake. - Meg Whitman

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

On behalf of every man looking out for every girl, you are the God and weight of her world. - John Mayer

We're really just the frosting on a cake and we don't know what's inside the cake. - Adam Riess

Everything slows down with age. Except the time it takes cake and ice cream to reach your hips. - John Wagner

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond. - Mae West

Grief can be a burden, but also an anchor. You get used to the weight, how it holds you in place. - Sarah Dessen

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience. - John Updike

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

The first requisite of a good citizen in this republic of ours is that he shall be able and willing to pull his weight. - Theodore Roosevelt

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on. - Jean Kerr