We're Off to See the Wizard!
Presidential aid from the Wizard Of Oz
Four United States Presidents get caught up in a tornado and off they whirled to the land of OZ. They finally made it to the Emerald City and went to find the Great Wizard...
'What brings the 4 of you before the great Wizard of Oz?'
Jimmy Carter stepped forward timidly and said, 'I've come for some courage.'
'No Problem! said the Wizard. Who’s next?' Richard Nixon stepped forward. 'Well, I think I need a heart.'
'Done! says the Wizard. Who comes next before the Great and Powerful Oz?' Up stepped Dubya and said, 'I’m told by the American people that I need a brain.'
'No problem! said the Wizard. Consider it done.' Then there is a great silence in the hall. Bill Clinton is just standing there, looking around... 'Is Dorothy here?'
Politics have no relation to morals. - Niccolo Machiavelli
Man is not free unless government is limited. - Ronald Reagan
I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers
If men were angels, no government would be necessary. - James Madison
The Golden Rule has no place in a political campaign. - John J Ingalls
Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan
Poetry is about the grief. Politics is about the grievance. - Robert Frost
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx
I don't go around signin' no political documentaries. - Archie Bunker
You can't get rich in politics unless you're a crook. - Harry S Truman
Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under. - H L Mencken
A government is the only known vessel that leaks from the top. - James Reston
Politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. - Charles de Gaulle
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop. - P.J. O'Rourke
My sheer existence is like a political act to a lot of people. It's not to me. - Grimes
Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins
I love Canada. I am from Canada. I will bash the Canadian government but never Canada. - Jason Priestley
My brother Bob doesn't want to be in government - he promised Dad he'd go straight. - John F Kennedy
What is the first part of politics? Education. The second? Education. And the third? Education. - Jules Michelet
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown
Animals are like little children a bit. They're simple. They don't have politics driving them. - Annabelle Sabloff
I don't look for much to come out of government ownership as long as we have Democrats and Republicans. - Kin Hubbard
One of the key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace, good people don't go into government. - Donald Trump
Politics: Poli, a Latin word meaning "many"; and tics, meaning "bloodsucking creatures." - Robin Williams
If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 years there'd be a shortage of sand. - Milton Friedman
One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. - Plato
The only security men can have for their political liberty, consists in keeping their money in their own pockets. - Lysander Spooner
Our whole constitutional heritage rebels at the thought of giving government the power to control men's minds. - Thurgood Marshall
In politics it is necessary either to betray one's country or the electorate. I prefer to betray the electorate. - Charles de Gaulle
Canada's political parties spend a few years in opposition and then govern as if it's permanent payback time. - Bob Rae
One of the reasons people hate politics is that truth is rarely a politician's objective. Election and power are. - Cal Thomas
The business of government is to keep the government out of business - that is, unless business needs government aid. - Will Rogers
Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. - Ambrose Bierce
The punishment which the wise suffer who refuse to take part in the government, is to live under the government of worse men. - Plato
Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. - Ronald Reagan
In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire
When one may pay out over two million dollars to presidential and Congressional campaigns, the U.S. government is virtually up for sale. - John W. Gardner
Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien
In politics, as in womanizing, failure is decisive. It sheds its retrospective gloom on earlier endeavor which at the time seemed full of promise. - Malcolm Muggeridge
Political correctness is about denial, usually in the weasel circumlocutory jargon which distorts and evades and seldom stands up to honest analysis. - George M Fraser