#1 humor site on the 'net

Colour Car

Interior decorating idea not meant for colour-blind drivers

Colour Car thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

How to Easter-eyes your car

QuotaBills
Fjord: Norwegian car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The color of truth is gray. - Andre Gide

Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Each day has a color, a smell. - Chitra B. Divakaruni

It's a beautiful beege color. - Archie Bunker

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Dialogue: Changing the colour of a piece of wood - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There would be no Christmas if there was no Easter. - Gordon B. Hinckley

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

Easter spells out beauty, the rare beauty of new life. - S D Gordon

Those have a short Lent who owe money to be paid at Easter. - Benjamin Franklin

I'm Jewish, so I don't know much about Easter eggs. - Simon Kinberg

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

Easter is meant to be a symbol of hope, renewal, and new life. - Janine di Giovanni

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti

On Easter Day the veil between time and eternity thins to gossamer. - Douglas Horton

People can have the Model T in any color - so long as it's black. - Henry Ford

Easter says you can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there. - Clarence W Hall

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Unless there is a Good Friday in your life, there can be no Easter Sunday. - Fulton J Sheen

It is sometimes as dangerous to be run into by a microbe as by a trolley car. - J.J. Walsh

One should absorb the color of life, but one should never remember its details. - Oscar Wilde

The very first Easter taught us this: that life never ends and love never dies. - Kate McGahan

For I remember it is Easter morn, and life and love and peace are all new born. - Alice F Palmer

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

The story of Easter is the story of God's wonderful window of divine surprise. - Carl Knudsen

Easter is the demonstration of God that life is essentially spiritual and timeless. - Charles M Crowe

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9. - Muppets

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people and hallelujah is our song. - Pope John Paul II

Easter is the only time when it's perfectly safe to put all of your eggs in one basket. - Evan Esar

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Christ appeared alive on several occasions after the cataclysmic events of that first Easter. - Josh McDowell

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches awaiting Easter. - Fran Lebowitz

To a Christian, Easter Sunday means everything, when we celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ. - Bernhard Langer

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

The guitar is a small orchestra. It is polyphonic. Every string is a different color, a different voice. - Andres Segovia

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

For me, the drive is storytelling. To be a part of an art that tells a story and to be a catalyst, a color in that, is very exciting. - Alden Ehrenreich

When nature is my inspiration and subject, I am witness to an extraordinary range of color and every imaginable atmospheric condition. - Karen Casey

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

Passover and Easter are the only Jewish and Christian holidays that move in sync, like the ice skating pairs we saw during the winter Olympics. - Marvin Olasky

With so much to be aware of, awareness bracelets have reverted to signifying nothing more than color itself. Idealism has devolved into fashion. - Timothy Noah

Race only matters to a racist. All lives matter. If you have to put a color on it, then you are a racist. God only created one race - the human race. - Tom Wallace

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Cow Nap

Ear Chip

Sleep With Us

Puppy Taco

Fresh Air Computing

Koalified

How Much Time Left

Expandable Equation

Devoted Husband

Statue of Libertea

Beaver Stretching

Social Media Explained

Famous Equations

Ain't Mowing the Lawn Anymore

Crocpox

Deer Me!

Inverted Helicopter

Water Hat

NASCAR Fan - Diehard Category

Busted

Build It - They Will Come

Exhausted Baby

Monkeypox II

Overloaded Bookshop